Grace
by Rhianna-Aurora
Summary: [Balthier x Ashe] Even in the darkest of times, there is a need to connect with another. For the Sky Pirate and the Princess, that time is now ... WARNING: there are some sexual situations in this fic! Spoilers up to and including Draklor, for now.
1. Into the Fire

**A/N: **Yes, I'm back! FFXII is my new obsession, Bal x Ashe is my new OTP. Now that _that_ is cleared up ...

I've been so busy and so AWOL lately, and I apologize sincerely to everyone who has been waiting/hoping that I might update some of my other stories. At this point in time, I just don't see that happening. I do hope that you'll enjoy _this_ offering however. It's actually already finished, it's just a matter of me getting it posted! lol

Disclaimer: I own nothing, I'm making nooo money off of this whatsoever. Square Enix created the characters, places, etc. I just like to play with them! XD

_**Part One  
Into the Fire**  
_  
Sitting in the Sandsea Tavern in Rabanastre, his thoughts were miles away. He held the silver band in the palm of his hand, almost as though he was testing its weight. In a way, he supposed that he was. Testing the weight of responsibility that he had chosen to shoulder.

He wanted to say that he didn't know _why_ he had agreed to this foolhardy scheme. But, with a sardonic smile, he knew that he must admit the truth of the matter, but only to himself. Of _course_ he knew why he'd agreed to it.

It would tarnish his reputation if word were to get around that a pair of sad, ice-blue eyes had become his downfall. Of all the girls in all the lands, none of them had managed to appeal to that deeper part of him. Until _her_.

True, he could have said no. Walked away, gone back to doing what he did best -- pirating. But what kind of leading man would that make him?

Funny, that. He'd never imagined in all his wildest fantasies that his leading lady would turn out to be a somewhat surly, entirely-too-serious Princess.

Fran sat across from Balthier, studying her partner with keen observance. Something was troubling him, and that in turn, troubled her. She'd known Balthier for many years, and only a few things caused him to look the way he looked now. One of those things was his father, but she knew that wasn't likely the cause of his disquietude. No, she sensed something much different about him now. She reached across the table and touched his hand in reassurance.

He jumped ever so slightly, and the viera frowned. Balthier was known for his keen awareness. Nothing took him by surprise. "Balthier," she began cautiously. She wasn't afraid of him, no, on the contrary, but she still knew when to tread lightly. His hazel eyes snapped in her direction. "You are troubled this night," she continued. "Do you wish to talk about it?"

He looked at her, saw his best friend, his confidante, his soulmate -- and he couldn't tell her. Mainly because he couldn't even tell himself. "Fran, it's nothing," he said offhandedly.

Fran nodded, and hoped her eyes did not show the hurt she felt. Balthier had never lied to her before. The she noticed it. The silver band that he was holding in his hand, unconsciously rubbing with his thumb as though it were a worry stone.

The ring -- Lord Rasler's ring. The ring that he had taken from -- the ring that he'd taken from _Ashe_ that very afternoon.

Lady Ashe. Princess Ashelia B'Nargin Dalmasca, if you wished to be formal about it. The steel-willed, cool-eyed heiress to the Dalmascan throne. Fran had seen the familiar flicker of interest in Balthier's eyes upon first seeing the Lady -- but Balthier got that look for nearly every pretty female (and occasionally some _un_-pretty ones) that he came in contact with. That was nothing new. It would have concerned Fran more if the interest _hadn't _been there. It was no secret that Balthier loved women -- and they certainly loved him in return.

No, there was nothing amiss that Fran could discern ... but she still felt ill-at-ease about the situation.

"Why did you agree to this quest?" she asked him after a long pause. "You must know where it's likely to lead us."

"I know," Balthier said quietly, taking a long drink of his ale.

"Will you tell them, before?" the viera inquired.

He knew she spoke of his father. The Empire's own "mad scientist". "Why bother, Fran? It won't likely change things, now will it?"

She smiled wanly. "No, I suppose not."

"Well, see? No need getting everyone worked into a lather over something of little consequence."

"_There_ you are!" Penelo's voice cried out from behind him. She approached their table, Vaan in tow. "Basch sent us to find you."

"Afraid we'd run off, was he?" Balthier said, winking at the young blonde girl.

"Actually, I think he was," Penelo replied, cheeks flushing at the dashing sky pirate's attention.

Vaan grabbed a seat and began munching on the pretzels that were in the middle of the table. "Well, _actually_, it was Ashe who was worried about that."

Penelo whirled on him as Balthier's head snapped up. "Vaan, she told you not to say anything!" Penelo said through gritted teeth.

"Whoops," Vaan said, obviously embarrassed.

"What's this about Ashe?" Fran asked, looking back at Balthier.

"Oh, well, she just thought ... anyone insensitive enough to take her husband's ring might be insensitive enough to run off with no warning," Penelo mumbled quickly, not meeting the pirate's eyes. She winced when she heard Balthier's sharp intake of breath. "But you have to understand! She's very upset tonight! I mean, Vossler turned on her -- he was the person she trusted _most_. And now she's traveling with a bunch of strangers, and on top of all that, you took Rasler's ring ... it's been a long day for the princess."

Balthier's eyes closed as he felt the the guilt creep over him. It wasn't an emotion he was accustomed to, and it didn't feel good.

"She didn't mean it, Balthier," Vaan said simply. "She's just tired tonight."

"I'll be back, Fran," Balthier said, standing up. "I have an apology to make."

Fran nodded once, and watched him go, completely baffled. Balthier didn't apologize for anything. It simply wasn't in his nature. So, why ...?

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

To say that Ashe was in a foul temperament was a gross understatement. She stomped around the tiny room the group had rented at Rabanastre's seediest inn, exhaling noisily and with much contempt.

"Highness, you need rest," Basch implored. "We have much traveling to do tomorrow."

"Don't tell me to rest. I'm not tired!" Ashe retorted hotly. Sighing, she flopped down to the floor in a most ungracious manner. "I apologize. It isn't you I should be angry with. You did not betray me today."

"Apology accepted," Basch said wryly, an amused twinkle in his dark blue eyes. Ashe felt the corners of her mouth quirking upward despite herself.

"Basch?" she asked after a few moments.

"Yes, Highness?"

"Do you think that he left?" Her voice sounded forlorn, child-like. She hated that, but for some reason unbeknownst to her, it couldn't be helped.

"Who?" Basch asked, puzzled.

"Balthier," Ashe sighed softly, not meeting her guardian's eyes.

Basch was silent for a long moment. "No, Highness. I don't believe that he did. Pirate he may be, but I think we can trust him. I think you _should _trust him," he told her.

Ashe nodded. "I suppose you are right." She paused, looked around. "I _am _tired. Would you mind giving me a moment?"

"Of course." Basch stood and exited the room with a quick bow.

As soon as she was alone, Ashe sat on the edge of the bed and pulled off her boots. She unfastened her shin- and wrist-guards, and then slid out of her traveling clothes. She went to her small knapsack and pulled out a simple, ankle-length cotton nightgown in a soft shade of pink, and slid it over her head. She knew that this may well be the last time for a long time she'd be afforded such simple luxuries as wearing a nightgown or sleeping in an actual bed.

She tied her hair up and began pulling the blankets down when she heard the door creak open. "Don't you knock, Basch? Suppose I was still naked?"

"Well, that would be very interesting indeed, Princess."

_Oh, gods. Not Basch._ Ashe's pulse quickened at the voice and her fists tightened around the bedclothes. Luckily her back was to him, so he couldn't see the fear/humiliation/excitement on her face. _Especially_ not the excitement. She herself was horrified at the notion that he sparked any kind of interest at all from her.

"What are you doing in here?" she demanded in her coolly regal tone.

"Enjoying the view," Balthier said smugly. He laughed heartily when she spun around, ice-blue eyes shooting daggers. "Ah, that got your attention."

She glared at his teasing expression. "This is very improper. You're aware of that, aren't you?"

"Princess, we all have to share this room. In fact, I'd garner a wager that you'll be sharing that bed of yours by the time all is said and done, and probably a dozen others along the course of this journey. I'd say it isn't really a matter of propriety as it is necessity," Balthier said breezily, sitting on the corner of the bed.

"Well, there may be truth in that," Ashe said slowly, uncertainly.

"Good." Baltheir nodded. "I came to apologize to you. I'm not in the habit of apologizing, but I felt that I owed you one."

"I'm listening," Ashe said, tilting her chin up in a slightly haughty fashion that made Balthier want to laugh.

"I'm sorry for taking Lord Rasler's ring today," he said simply.

Ashe looked at him, really looked at him. "You -- are?"

"Don't mistake me, Princess. I'm not sorry I took the ring. I'm just sorry I took it _today_ after what you went through with Vossler," Balthier explained.

"Oh, I see. So the fact that you took the only thing left to me of my husband --"

"Your late husband," Balthier interjected.

"Excuse me?" Ashe said sharply.

"You called him your husband. I simply corrected you," Balthier replied matter-of-factly.

"Just because he died does _not_ make him less of a husband to me," Ashe hissed.

"Is that so?" Balthier asked. "So he's able to do all the things for you that a husband should? He's able to protect you, provide for you -- make love to you?" Without realizing it, Balthier had stood up and was now standing mere inches from the Princess.

"I don't need anyone to protect or provide for me!" Ashe cried, flustered for reasons she couldn't fathom.

"And the rest?" Balthier asked, softer now. His fingers had found a loose tendril of Ashe's hair and were stroking it absently. "How long has it been, Princess?"

Ashe shoved him back with such force that he nearly lost his footing. "Not long enough," she spat at him contemptuously. "If I live to be a _hundred_ it won't be long enough."

"Fair enough," Balthier said, turning to go. He got to the door and paused. "I'm not going anywhere," he said. "Whether you believe me or not, I'm going to help you get your crown back.

"Oh. And I took Rasler's ring because you looked terribly sad whenever you'd look at it. I want to help you with that, as well. Perhaps someday you'll permit me."

Ashe bit her bottom lip and blinked back tears that she was unaccustomed to. "Don't hold your breath," she told him coolly.

He nodded. He'd expected no less from her. "Goodnight, Princess."

The door clicked shut behind him, and she heard voices on the other side. Concern for her, Balthier telling everyone to give her a moment or two.

She fell onto the bed with a long, heavy sigh. Her body felt as though it were coiled up around itself, and her hands were shaking inexplicably.

She had loved Rasler with every fiber of her being -- would always love him as such. They'd grown up together, and had been ecstatic when they'd learned of their betrothal. She knew that they would have ruled a happy and peaceful Dalmasca.

But there was no more hope of that. Even if she managed to regain her crown and restore her lost kingdom, she would be ruling alone -- at least, until a suitable match could be made. But she couldn't imagine that anyone would ever compare to the husband she'd lost. She'd had so little time to be happy with him ...

And now ... now there was Balthier. Gods help her, she didn't know what to feel about him. He was maddeningly charming, undeniably handsome -- but was he trustworthy? And did that even matter? The truth of the matter was, he stirred feelings in her that hadn't been stirred since Rasler. And just admitting that to herself felt like betrayal.

She had spent two years in hiding, two years trying to get her life pieced back together. Two years she'd thought of naught but Dalmasca. She hadn't let herself feel, because if she did, she'd remember Rasler, and she'd wish she were dead. It wasn't until a chance meeting in the Garamsythe Waterway that any flicker of emotion had come her way, unbidden though it was.

On the _Leviathan_, when they had come to rescue her, his was the first face she saw -- but so much happened that she'd had no chance to think about what it all meant. She'd never dreamed that she would be traveling with this motley group of people -- never dreamed that anyone would care about her plight as she did.

He was a sky pirate. Treasure was of utmost importance to him. But he seemed to want_ her_, as well. Or perhaps she was mistaking nothing but a bit of trifling for something more.

And then there were her _own _feelings to consider. Just allowing herself to feel anything for anyone felt like the worst kind of treachery. But try as she might, and she had tried_ mightily_, they wouldn't go away. It had taken _everything _she had to push Balthier away earlier. She knew in her heart that if she let him kiss her -- all would be lost.

And she wouldn't lose all to a dastardly sky pirate. She _couldn't_. She prayed to the gods for the strength of will that she would need to resist the irresistible.

The door clicked open and Ashe pulled the blankets up to her chin. "You okay now, Ashe?" Penelo asked.

"Yes, I'm fine, thank you," Ashe replied, her eyes following Balthier covertly. She watched as everyone spread out blankets and bedrolls on the floor of the tiny room. It had been decided before that the Princess would get the bed, since it was likely to be the last they'd see for a while.

Basch slept near the door, ever the loyal guardian. Penelo and Vaan lay very near to one another. Near enough to make Ashe wonder. Fran took a spot near the bed, and that's when Ashe realized with horror that the floor was completely full. She doubted there was enough room for a moogle down there, let alone --

Balthier sat on the edge of the bed, pulling off his boots, whistling all the while.

Ashe groaned. "This is ridiculous!" she hissed. "What _are_ you doing?" Her eyes widened as he removed his leather vest and linen shirt.

He lay down beside her and yawned. "It would appear that I'm going to sleep."

"No, no, _no_." Ashe shook her head firmly. "This is _un_acceptable."

Balthier tossed her a quick grin. "Better be quiet. Everyone else is asleep."

"Get out of my bed," she demanded.

"Where would you have me sleep, Princess?" he asked dryly.

"Well, switch with somebody!" she whispered vehemently.

"Go to sleep, Princess." He snuffed out the bedside candle, throwing the room into darkness.

Ashe lie there, keenly aware of the body beside hers.

_How long has it been, Princess?_ she heard his voice echoing in her head as she tried to fall asleep.

_Too long ..._


	2. Rain

_**Part Two  
Rain**_

Ashe barely slept. When she finally managed to doze off, she had a dream about Rasler. But in her dream, his eyes were hazel, not blue.

She awoke with a start. She turned her head to the right and saw that Balthier was gone. Sighing with relief, she climbed out of bed.

Only then did she realize that everyone else was gone, as well. "Damn," she cursed and hurriedly began to dress.

She'd gotten her shirt and skirt on and was fastening her left shin-guard when the door opened. She gritted her teeth when Balthier entered. "Knocking would be appreciated," she told him.

"Ah, but if I did that, I wouldn't be able to surprise you," he teased. "Frankly, I was rather hoping to catch you before you'd dressed."

"That's _enough_," Ashe said coldly. "Stop making these senseless innuendos. We might be traveling companions, but I am _still_ a princess. And you are out of line."

"Oh, I'm aware of that," Balthier told her. "Besides, I wasn't meaning to imply that I wished to catch you _au naturel_. Just in that rather fetching nightdress you had on."

Ashe bit back a grin. He was _too charming_ for his own good. And for hers. Shaking her head, she finished dressing in record time. "Just so we're clear," she said, combing out her flaxen hair, "there's to be no more bed-sharing between us. It's simply too untoward."

"Just so we're clear," Balthier mimicked, taking the comb out of her hand and turning her around to face him, "there won't be many more beds to share." He handed her a steaming mug of coffee. "If you had the same kind of night that I had, you'll need that."

She smiled behind her cup. "What kept you up -- _awake_?" she corrected quickly.

He grinned devilishly, then sighed. He put his hand on her shoulder and lowered his lips to her ear. "You have the softest skin," he said in an honest whisper.

Ashe lowered her mug. "Balthier --" she closed her eyes. "Don't," she said when she felt his hand slide down her arm. "Just -- don't."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"You are aware that she can't be one of your conquests," Fran said in a low voice to Balthier as they walked the streets of Rabanastre later that morning.

"What _are_ you talking about, Fran?" Balther said breezily, studying a clay pot that a Bazaar merchant had on display.

"You know what I'm talking about," Fran said warningly.

"Don't worry so much, Fran," he told he, giving her shoulder a reassuring squeeze.

"I _will_ worry, because she is not just some woman you met whilst we were out traveling. She's not a fisherman's wife, daughter, or even a bar wench," Fran said.

"I'm well aware of that point of fact," Balthier dead-panned. He held up a beaded necklace to her, grinning.

She slapped his hand away playfully. "Don't you try to charm me," she said. "Remember, it doesn't work."

"Something I've lamented many a time," he quipped good-naturedly.

"Just be careful," she warned. "She is no ordinary girl, and this is not an ordinary situation."

"Duly noted," he said absently as the subject of their conversation walked by, listening intently to something Penelo was saying. Basch and Vaan weren't far behind.

Fran rolled her eyes in amusement. She'd borne witness to this time and again. Balthier would be completely useless until he got what he was after. Sighing, she realized in this situation, he might well be completely useless until they'd finished this quest and left Dalmasca and Ashelia far behind.

Balthier and Fran followed the others to Rabanastre's Southgate, the quickest way to Giza Plains, Ozmone Plains, and finally Jahara, which was their intended destination.

Basch cleared his throat when they approached. "We were just discussing battle strategy. It would be better to split into two groups of three for exploratory purposes."

Fran nodded. "Agreed," she said.

"Right. If we run into trouble, there's no use in everyone taking the beating," Balthier added. He snuck a glance in Ashe's direction and was pleased to see that she was glancing back at him. She looked away as soon as she noticed him looking back.

"Obviously, I must stay with the Princess," Basch said. "And Penelo wishes to stay with Vaan. So the two of you can decide for yourselves."

Fran smirked slightly. "I will go with Vaan and Penelo. They need a good archer with them." She smiled at Balthier and walked over to the children.

Penelo smiled at the viera, then narrowed her eyes when she saw Fran's satisfied expression. "What are you up to?" she whispered.

"Ah, just helping a friend," Fran replied.

"Well, then, I will accompany the Princess," Balthier said, as though the whole thing mattered to him not. He walked over and stood as near to Ashe as he could get away with, without anyone saying anything.

Ashe wanted to object, but how could she do that without causing a scene? She took a deep breath and got a heady whiff of the leather of Balthier's vest. Why was he standing so close to her?

"Shall we be off, then?" Basch said. "When we get to Giza, you go left, Fran, and we'll go right. We'll meet at the entrance to Ozmone."

"Sounds good to me," Vaan said, and started walking, Penelo not far behind.

"Let me go ahead, Highness," Basch told Ashe. "I'll cut you a path. Balthier, I trust you'll protect her in my absence?"

Balthier nodded with mock dignity. He waited until Basch had a good lead on him, and then took Ashe by the elbow. "Yes, let's let your bodyguard to his job, shall we?"

"And what are _you_ going to do?" Ashe asked, cocking her head to the side.

"You heard the man. I'm to protect you," he said earnestly.

"Ah, but who will protect me from _you_, I wonder?" she said wryly.

"Why, Princess, are you frightened of me?"

Ashe smiled sadly. "Maybe a little," she said with a heavy sigh.

"I see," Balthier said. "Might I inquire as to why?"

Ashe shook her head. "You may not."

That made Balthier smile, and Ashe's pulse quickened at the sight. "Some day, I think you'll tell me," he said.

"Don't hold your breath," Ashe said as the first drops of rain from Giza Plains fell on her bare shoulders.

"I daresay we'll be soaked through and through by the time we've quit this place," Balthier observed. "Are you all right, Princess?"

But Ashe was smiling. A real, honest-to-gods smile, the likes of which Balthier had never seen from her before. "Are you kidding?" she laughed. "I'd forgotten how much I love the rain!" She held her hands out, palms open, and relished in the way the rain felt as it danced along her skin.

Balthier leaned against a nearby tree and watched in amusement. In this moment, she was no longer Ashelia B'Nargin, Princess of Dalmasca. In this moment, she was just Ashe, just a girl in the rain. And Balthier knew what to do with girls in the rain.

He pushed off of the tree and walked over to her. He took her wrists in his hands and pulled her body to his own. Looking down at her rain-plastered hair, he couldn't help but to smile. Her eyes were wide and bright and questioning, and for a minute, he just stared. Then she lowered her lashes ever-so-slightly and it completely undid him.

He crushed her mouth with his own, amazed at his lack of control. He fisted his hands in her hair and deepened the kiss.

_Too fast, too fast. It's happening too fast!_ Ashe thought frantically. One minute she was enjoying the feel of the rain on her skin, the next, Balthier had grabbed her and then --

Then he was kissing her. The very thing she had sworn to avoid. And she knew she should stop him, she _knew_ it. But he was warm and firm and _so good_ at what he was doing and everything that she'd been missing without even realizing. And it had been so long, _too_ long. She told herself it was just a momentary weakness, it would never happen again.

But then he slid his tongue over hers and she felt herself running her fingers through his rain-dampened hair and pulling him closer. She heard the gutteral sound that she made in the back of her throat and felt his name tumble out of her mouth breathily. "Balthier."

As soon as she said it, she pulled away. Her head still spinning, her heart still pounding. For a brief moment she swore she saw Rasler staring back at her -- and he was crying. "Oh, gods," she whispered, hand over her mouth.

"Ashe," Balthier said, reaching out to her.

But she backed away, shaking her head as though in disbelief. "No. Don't. I -- I can't believe I --"

"Ashe!" he said, firmer now. "You didn't do anything to be so upset about. Ashe, look at me!"

"I can't!" she cried, spinning on her heel and running off in the direction of Basch.

"Damn it," Balthier cursed, running his hands through his wet hair angrily. He wasn't mad at Ashe. No, he was mad at himself. Mad at himself for forgetting who she was, for thinking this was just another girl.

Because this was _not_ another girl. Fran had been right, and he'd been a blithering idiot. And now he'd have to work like hell to make things right again. That kiss had made one thing very clear to him.

One kiss from Ashelia B'Nargin was not nearly enough.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**A/N:** If you couldn't tell, I'm a big fan of sexual tension. XD Hope you guys are enjoying this!


	3. Broken Road

_**Part Three  
**__**Broken Road**_

They reached Jahara, Land of the Garif, just before dusk. They were all tired, cold, and hungry, but Ashe insisted on speaking with the Elders right away. She needed to know how to harness the power of the nethicite, so that she might get her kingdom back. They were finally told to seek the Great-Chief in a hut in the highest part of the village.

The group went in and Ashe handed the Dawn Shard to the Great-Chief. "This Nethicite -- you have used it," he said in a deep, gravelly voice.

Ashe shook her head. "It was not I who used it. Indeed I had hoped you could show me how. Thus I've come."

The Garif regarded her solemnly. "You do not know the workings of the stone. Then we are no different."

Ashe looked at him, her brow furrowed, eyes questioning. "What?" she asked, confused.

"In ages past, the Gods made a gift of Nethicite to my people. But the manner of its use eluded us. Displeased by our failure, the Gods took back their stones. They chose instead to give them to a Hume King. Called the Dynast-King, he used the Nethicite's power to bring peace to a troubled time. It is a curious thing. Though the blood of Raithwall flow through your veins, you cannot wield Nethicite," the Elder explained, calling forth visions of the past in the smoke of his bonfire.

"Cannot wield it?" Ashe asked, puzzled. "Then, am I to understand that you cannot tell me how to use the stone?"

"Though it shame me so to admit. Here before me stands a descendent of the Dynast-King himself ... and I can accord her no help at all. Still, even if you knew how to use the Nethicite, you would find it of small avail. The Mist collected in the stone over ages past is lost, and with it the stone's power. It will be your posterity who wield the stone in ages yet to come."

The group looked at the Great-Chief in silence. Vaan cast a glance in Ashe's direction. He felt bad for her. They'd come all this way, only to end up right back where they'd started.

"The stone is devoid of power," the Great-Chief concluded. "Empty, yet full of thirst. A terrible longing to drink the world dry. The power of men, and of Magick. Of good, and of evil. It is often those who desire Nethicite whom the Nethicite itself desires."

They heard the sound of footsteps approaching from outside, and Ashe turned around to see who it was.

"Larsa?" Penelo asked incredulously.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Later that night, Ashe stood outside, thinking about what Larsa had said. He had told her that they should make all haste to Mt. Bur-Omisace. The Gran Kiltias Anastasis, he said, could give her the validation she would need to reclaim her throne, and help stop this war that Larsa felt was imminent between Archadia and Rozarria.

"Why should I help the Empire?" Ashe had demanded of the young man.

"Because Dalmasca would be the battleground!" he'd said imploringly. "What if they used Nethicite on Rabanastre? You know my brother would do this!" At Ashe's steely look, Larsa backed down. "Forgive me, I presumed overmuch. I could think of no other way to avoid bloodshed. If you cannot trust me, then please, take me as your hostage."

Ashe was still thinking about his words as she walked down the hill, toward one of the Garif's bridges over the River Sogoht. It was then that she saw him. "Rasler?" she said in disbelief, running to the bridge where her husband was standing.

But as she approached, the apparition faded until she saw that it was only Vaan, looking out over the water. "You saw him, didn't you? Like at Raithwall's tomb?"

Ashe walked up beside the younger boy. "So you _did_ see him, too." Her brow furrowed. "But why?"

"It's strange," Vaan said. "Before all this started, I didn't even know what you looked like. And the Prince? I barely even knew there _was_ a Prince. Who knows? Maybe the person I saw at the tomb was my brother."

"Basch told me about him," Ashe said sympathetically. She had lost brothers in this war, as well.

"He enlisted, right at the end. But why? He knew we couldn't win."

"To protect something," Ashe said simply.

"How can he protect anything if he's dead?" Vaan said angrily. "Was it different for Prince Rasler? Did that make sense?" Ashe could think of nothing to say, so she just smiled sadly. "Hating the Empire, getting revenge, that was all I ever thought about. But I never did anything about it. I'd just say that I was gonna be a Sky Pirate ... or some other stupid thing. Just anything to keep my mind off of it. I was just -- running away. I needed to get away from his death. That's why I followed you."

Ashe cocked her head to the side, interested. "I'm through running," he said firmly. "I'm ready to find my purpose. To find some real answers -- some reasons. If I stick with you, I think I will."

Ashe just shook her head. "I wish I knew," she said sadly, truthfully.

"I'll find 'em," Vaan said resolutely.

After talking to Vaan, Ashe wandered back to the hut the Jahara had generously bestowed upon the party for the night. Penelo was talking animatedly with Larsa in one corner. Ashe wondered if that's why Vaan had been outside, walking around so dejectedly. The corners of her mouth quirked up. _Jealous, Vaan?_ she wondered.

"Penelo, I'm sorry to interrupt," Ashe said, approaching the two.

"Not at all," Penelo said kindly.

"Have you seen Basch?"

"He's speaking with the War-Chief. Fran went with him," Balthier said from behind Ashe.

Penelo smiled. "Yeah. What he said." She went back to her conversation then, seemingly uninterested in anything but the young lord.

Ashe turned to Balthier, motioned for him to follow her out to the back of the hut. She walked slowly, hands behind her back. "I wanted to apologize for this morning," she said. "I should not have done that."

"Apology accepted. Next time I kiss you, I hope you won't be so eager to run away," Balthier said smugly.

Ashe's eyes narrowed. "I'm apologizing for the kiss itself. It shouldn't have happened. There will not _be_ a next time. And I think that you should apologize to me." Her chin was set at that haughty level again.

Balthier laughed. "You're apologizing for a kiss that should, by all rights, go into the record books? And you expect me to follow suit?" He shook his head. "No dice, Princess. I will not apologize for that kiss. And neither should you." He looked at her pointedly.

"You -- you're insufferable!" Ashe stammered.

"That may be, but it seems to work for you."

"No, it doesn't," Ashe said viciously. "It was a temporary lapse in judgement, a moment of weakness. You have -- no effect on me me whatsoever."

"Is that so?" Balthier said challengingly.

"Yes," Ashe said firmly.

"Well, in that case --" He grabbed her by the shoulders and lifted her off the ground. He kissed her firmly and roughly on the mouth for what seemed to be an eternity, and then set her down as though nothing had happened.

He smirked triumphantly at the way her chest heaved as she tried to catch her breath; the way her eyes had gone glassy with desire. He started to walk past her into the hut, and paused. His lips brushed her earlobe as he whispered, "I plan on kissing you again. I've planned on kissing you often and much since the first time I saw you."

Trying to ignore the shivers running down her spine, Ashe turned to him. "Do I not have a say in all of this?" she demanded.

He shrugged. "If it will make you feel better, Princess, I won't kiss you again until you ask me."

"Are you so sure I _will_ ask you?" she said defiantly. All she was left with was his laughter as he went back inside.

Shaking her head angrily, she kicked at the dirt. "Of all the egotistical bastards! Well, we'll see who gets the last laugh. I wouldn't ask _him_ to kiss me if he were the last man in Ivalice!"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next morning, Ashe was awake and ready to go before anyone else. She sat outside the hut in the pre-dawn light, waiting to see the sunrise light up the horizon. She sipped a cup of strong Garif tea and mulled over their latest objective. Larsa had said the Gran Kiltias could help, so that's where they would go.

"You're up early," Penelo's voice shook Ashe from her musings. "Are you nervous about the Gran Kiltias?"

Ashe regarded the younger girl fondly. She imagined, had she grown up differently, she and Penelo might be very much alike. "I haven't reached nervous yet," Ashe confessed. "I'm just thinking, really. About many things."

Penelo bit her lip, wondering if she should say anything to Ashe about what she had seen last night. "About Balthier?" she proceeded cautiously.

"What?" Ashe said, feeling her cheeks flame. "What do you mean?"

Penelo looked down sheepishly. "After talking to Larsa last night, I went outside. I - I was looking for Vaan. I heard voices out back, and I thought it might be him. It -- wasn't." She laughed nervously.

"What -- exactly did you see?" Ashe asked, trying to stay calm.

"I saw him kiss you," Penelo confessed. "And then I went back inside, I promise! Oh, Ashe ..." Penelo's green eyes had a far-off, dreamy look to them.

"Oh, no, don't you get that look in your eyes for_ him_," Ashe scolded.

"But, he's terribly handsome, and so charming," Penelo contested.

Ashe rolled her eyes skyward. "Indeed. And he knows it, too." She shook her head. "What you witnessed last night was Balthier giving a fine performance as the world's most cock-sure, egotistical male _pig_."

"But -- he likes you, Ashe," Penelo said. "Why else would he even bother?"

"The thrill of the chase? The conquest of it all?" Ashe suggestedly sourly.

"If all he wanted was a conquest, don't you think he'd set his sights on someone a bit more -- obtainable?" Penelo asked. She squeezed Ashe's arm. "Either way, you're incredibly strong for being able to resist him. I know that _I _couldn't, were he to look at me that way."

"How did you become so smart?" Ashe asked her companion.

"Four older brothers, plus Vaan. I know how men act," Penelo said with a grin.

Ashe smiled finally. "I had eight older brothers myself. They taught me how to swordfight, how to defend myself, but I never bothered to see how they interacted with the Ladies at court. Never thought it was important. To royalty, flirting and courting are just a game. A game I never mastered." She sighed. "And here I am, facing off against a master of _all_ forms of the game."

"You're scared of him," Penelo concluded sagely.

"No, Penelo. I'm terrified." She looked at the younger girl in a near-panic. "You cannot tell anyone _any_ of this. Promise me!" She hadn't meant to bark at the girl, but if any of this got back to Balthier ...

"Ashe, it's okay. I won't say a word," Penelo reassured the Princess.

Later that morning, the group gathered near the exit of Jahara, discussing their next course of action. "I will accompany you to Mt. Bur-Omisace," Ashe told Larsa.

He smiled. "I had hoped you'd say yes. I'm glad."

She followed him away from the others, still discussing the upcoming trip. "My heart is not set. I still have questions, and I hope to find answers along the way," she said, and couldn't help but glance back at Balthier as she spoke.

"I had another reason for asking you," Larsa said. "There is someone on Mt. Bur-Omisace I want you to meet. An enemy, and an ally also. You'll have to see for yourself when we get there." He walked off toward the entrance to Ozmone Plains.

"That Larsa sure likes his secrets," Vaan commented, coming up behind Ashe.

She smiled. "He does not mean ill by it."

"He's not bad," Vaan said, shrugging. "For an Imperial." Ashe laughed a little, and along with Penelo, they followed Larsa.

Basch stood back a way and watched them. "Holy Mt. Bur-Omisace stands at the northern end of the Jagd Ramooda. Once we're in Jagd, we need not fear pursuit by their airships," he said to Balthier and Fran.

"Don't get your hopes up," Balthier commented. "Remember the _Leviathan _sailed straight over the Jagd Yensa, right up to Raithwall's Tomb. Skystone that works even in Jagd. You know Nethicite's behind it. Little wonder they're so keen on the stuff."

Basch regarded the younger man carefully before he continued. "And what of you, Balthier? You're a welcome hand, and a great aid, but why?"

"Worried I'm out to steal the Nethicite, are you?" Balthier asked smugly. "Can't say I'm unaccustomed to people doubting my intentions, but I assure you, nothing could be farther from my mind."

"And what of Ashe?" Basch implored, noting the way Balthier's eyes were following the Princess' departure.

"What of her?" Balthier shot back. "Worried I'm out to steal your Princess? _That_, my good friend, is something you will have to take up with her. I never was one to kiss and tell."

The look on Basch's face was priceless -- confused and angry, and not sure which one to be more of. "I meant to discuss with you the sleeping arrangements back in Rabanastre," he finally said to the sky pirate. "It should not have happened that way. From now on, I trust that you will not be sleeping in such close quarters with the Princess."

"Again, something you'll have to take up with Ashe," Balthier said. He motioned for Fran to follow him as they exited the village. "I'm only here to see how the story unfolds. Any self-respecting leading man would do the same."

Basch watched the sky pirates walk away, vowing to have a very serious discussion with Her Royal Highness about acceptable rules of conduct at the next possible juncture.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**A/N:** This chapter wasn't very exciting, I know. But I promise to make up for it soon!


	4. Show Me Heaven

_**Part Four  
Show Me Heaven**_

Golmore Jungle was dark and humid. Strange creatures wandered the winding, labrynthine corridors, lying in wait to ambush the unsuspecting party.

Ashe felt like she was wilting under the extreme conditions. Princesses were supposed to _glow_, not perspire, but she was _definitely_ perspiring. She would have given _anything_ for a nice long bath, but she supposed that would have to wait until after they'd been to Bur-Omisace. She rolled her neck back and forth as they approached an eerie glowing blue light. It looked like a dense mist, but upon closer inspection, it was revealed to be a barrier of some sort.

"The Wood. She is denying us passage," Fran said dejectedly.

"Why?" Ashe asked the viera with concern. "What have we done wrong?"

Fran studied the Princess solemnly. "We? No. _I_," she explained, somewhat forlornly. She began walking off in the opposite direction.

Balthier caught up with her. "Making an appearance?" he asked her in a low voice.

She simply nodded. "This is as much for you as it is for me," she told him distantly.

"Balthier! Fran!" Vaan called, rushing to catch up with them. Fran stopped in front of a seemingly dead end. "What's going on?" Vaan wondered.

"You will see," Fran told him. She made a motion with her hands, and a bright beam of light shot forth from her fingertips. Suddenly, a grassy, hidden path appeared.

"Whoa," Vaan said, obviously impressed.

Fran smiled a little. "Come," she said, leading the party down the long path into the hidden village of the viera -- Eruyt Village. They reached the entrance and Fran stopped. "Seek out Mjrn. She will know why you have come."

"You're not coming?" Penelo asked her.

"I am no longer welcome," Fran said cryptically. Ashe looked at her, puzzled. What could Fran have possibly done to make her unwelcome in her own home?

She soon found out. Apparently, Fran was the exception to the rule when it came to viera. Every viera they spoke to in the village proper was viciously rude to them. They soon learned that to the viera, leaving the confines of the Wood to live amongst humes was the worst commitable sin.

They inquired about Mjrn to everyone they saw, but the viera simply refused to aid them. "This is coming quite close to be utterly ridiculous," Balthier speculated in a low voice; so quiet that only Ashe -- who walked only a little way ahead of him -- heard.

Vaan exhaled noisily. "Hey, Mjrn lives here, doesn't she?" he said to the nearest viera. "We're here to see her."

No response. Then, a pink-clad viera priestess, who bore a striking resemeblance to Fran, emerged from one of the trees. "You will leave at once," she said in a soft voice that rolled with quiet anger. "It is not permitted for humes to walk these grounds."

Ashe had to admit, she was impressed that Vaan held his ground. "We'll go _after_ we've seen Mjrn," he said coolly.

The viera priestess looked at him with ill-concealed amusement. "If you can find her," she challenged, hands on hips.

"We're not leaving until you let us see her," Vaan said, crossing his arms over his chest. Balthier and Ashe exchanged a surprised glance, while the priestess stared Vaan down. Vaan threw up his hands in disgust. "Fine, then. We'll look for her ourselves." He turned to head out of the village.

Ashe was shocked to see Fran walking up the path to the priestess' abode. "I've heard the voice of the Wood. She says Mjrn is not in the village. Jote, where has she gone?"

"Why do you ask?" Jote asked. "The Wood tells us where she has gone. Or ... can you not hear her?" she sneered. Fran looked away quickly. "You cannot," Jote said triumphantly. "Your ears are dull from hearing _their_ harsh speech, I think. Viera who have abandoned the Wood are viera no longer. Mjrn, too, has left her embrace."

"And you forsake them in turn?" Balthier asked, hands balling into fists at his side.

Ashe noticed this, and tilted her head to the side slightly. He was _fiercely_ protective of those he loved; she could see that now. She felt the tiniest sting of jealousy, but mostly she was overwhelmed by the sudden rush of admiration (or was it _adoration_?) she felt for him. She wondered -- would he defend her in kind? Shaking her head, she realized that it mattered not. She had _other_ tasks at hand to see to, before she could allow herself to fantasize about a sky pirate ...

"It is the will of the village," Jote was saying in response to Balthier's accusation. "Viera must live always with the Wood. So says the Green Word, so is our law."

"We'll let you worry about keeping your laws. Just do us a favor and stay out of our way. We'll find her ourselves," Vaan said irritably.

Jote sighed and performed a small summoning spell to sense the missing viera. "She wanders warrens among men who hide themselves in clothes of cold iron. Thus to me has the Wood spoken." She started to walk away, but Fran's voice gave her pause.

"The Viera may begin as part of the Wood, but it is not the only end that we may choose."

"The same words I heard 50 years ago," Jote said wistfully, and then she walked away.

The group headed back to the village's entrance tunnel. "Not bad, Vaan," Balthier said, straightening his cuffs as he was so apt to do. "Didn't think we'd get anything out of that one." Sighing, he looked off in the distance. "So then, what was she saying about men in a warren?"

"The Henne Magicite Mines," Larsa contributed. "They lie in Bancour, south of the Ozmone Plains. The entire region is a colony of the Archadian Empire. There -- would be soldiers," he said uncertainly.

"Is that a problem?" Balthier asked shortly. "Let's move." Fran followed closely behind Balthier as he began to move down the path back to the jungle.

"Uh, Fran?" Vaan said, scratching the back of his head in uncertainty.

"Yes?" Fran said, turning to the younger man.

"I was thinking -- about what Jote said, you know? About how you said the same thing 50 years ago?"

"Your point?" Fran said in a voice that warned Vaan to tread lightly.

Vaan apparently didn't hear the warning tone. "How old were you again?"

Fran gave him a scathing look before she turned and walked off.

Ashe gasped in shock. "Vaan!" she said under her breath.

"Nice, Vaan," Balthier said sarcastically, following his partner out of the village.

"Surprisingly rude," Larsa said with disdain.

"Try to grow up, please?" Penelo said, amusement twinkling in her green eyes.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"My gods," Ashe murmured as they walked past the corpses strewn about the entrance to the Henne Mines.

"Researchers from the Draklor Laboratory," Larsa explained. "I wonder what they were doing here."

"Research," Balthier said dryly. He nodded his head, gesturing that everyone else should go on ahead, but stopped Ashe by putting a hand on her shoulder. "Be careful in there," he said quietly, reaching out to touch her face.

She stepped back before his hand could make contact with her cheek. "I always am," she said imperiously. As soon as she had brushed past him and was inside the relative safety of the mines, she smiled contentedly to herself. She had the answer to her earlier question ... Would he defend her?

Most definitely.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Nearly nine hours later, the party returned to Eruyt Village with a wounded Mjrn in tow. They walked the same path back to Jote's home. She came out to meet them. "I have heard the Wood's whispers," she said. She held out a small, shining jewel to Fran. "Take it. Lente's Tear is a permission. Pass through the Wood and leave. To other places, go."

Vaan sighed at Jote's indifference. Mjrn stepped up to Jote, fire in her eyes. "But ... that cannot be all! I saw it when I left the village! Ivalice is changing. How can the viera stand and do nothing?"

Jote looked at the younger viera coolly. "Ivalice is for the Humes. The Wood alone is for us."

"But that is wrong!" Mjrn contested. "How can we just hide here in the trees when all the world outside is on the move! I, too, wish to live freely—to leave this Wood!"

"Do not do this," Fran said firmly. Mjrn turned to Fran, a questioning look in her eyes. "You must remain away from the Humes. Stay with the Wood. Live together with the Wood. This is your way."

"But, Fran -- my sister!" Mjrn cried.

Fran shook her head sadly as she looked upon her younger sister. "I am no longer of you," she said. "I have discarded Wood and village. I won my freedom. Yet my past had been cut away forever. No longer can my ears hear the Green Word. This…solitude, you want, Mjrn?"

"Sister," Mjrn said quietly.

"No, Mjrn. Only one sister remains to you now." Fran's eyes met Jote's. "You must forget my existence."

Mjrn was visibly upset as she turned and fled. Ashe felt for her. But what could she possibly say to her?

"I am sorry to make you do this," Jote said to Fran after Mjrn had left.

"She goes against the laws of the Wood. I threw down these laws. It is better that I do this. Better I than one who must uphold these laws herself," Fran said as if it were the most simple thing in the world, really. Jote motioned for the other viera to leave them. After they had gone, Fran turned to her sister. "I have a request: Listen to the Wood's voice for me. I fear—I fear She hates."

Jote performed the summoning spell again. "The Wood longs for you. For the child lost from her boughs," she finally said.

Fran smiled wryly. "A pleasant lie, that," she said. She turned to take her leave.

"Be careful," Jote warned. "The Wood is jealous of the humes who have taken you." She cast a pointed look at Balthier, but Fran shook her head.

"No. He is safe. Goodbye, Sister," she said resolvedly.

She made her way back to the rest of the group, feeling as though a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. No more would she worry about her sisters back in the Wood. They would be fine. And so would she. The party would exit Eruyt Village with both Lente's Tear and Jote's blessing.

Continuing their trek through the jungle, Fran warned of a dangerous Elder Wyrm -- guardian of the Wood -- up ahead. "We're far too run-down from the Mines to attempt to fight him now. There is a secret inn that we viera know of up ahead. Any objections?"

Ashe nearly sobbed with relief when Fran opened up the secret path leading to a beautiful white-stone cottage surrounded by trees and lush tropical flowers. They entered the front door and Ashe was awed by the beauty of the building.

It was strange ... in a way, it reminded her of the Royal Palace in Rabanastre.

"Uh, there's no one to check us in," Penelo pointed out.

Fran smiled serenely. "This inn is the Wood's own, and the Wood is wise. Take a key from that basket It will open one of the rooms. The Wood takes care of the rest."

It might have seemed strange, but Ashe was too tired to argue with anyone at that point. If the Wood was to be her hostess for the evening, she would gladly accept that fact. She quickly selected a key and hurried down the hallway. She prayed that the Wood's idea of hospitality would include a nice, hot bath.

Her key opened the last room on the left. She had to suppress a delighted squeal as she pushed the door open. It was huge, decorated exactly as her old room at the Palace had been -- in subtle shades of green and pink. The bed was an enormous four-poster canopy with dozens of pillows piled atop it. A bottle of pink champagne chilled in an ice bucket on the vanity.

She opened the closet and sighed with rapture when she saw the rose-colored silk and lace negligee hanging inside. It had been _so long_ since she'd worn silk ...

There was a knock on her door then, and Fran entered. "It wasn't locked," she explained.

"It's fine, please come in," Ashe said warmly. She had grown quite fond of the viera, even if it was hard to relate to her sometimes.

Fran looked around and smiled. "The Wood has done well for you?"

"It's just like my room at the Palace," Ashe admitted wistfully. "Are the rooms always different?"

"They change, according to their occupant's desires. It would seem you desire to be home," Fran speculated. "Everything here is for you this night. Rest well."

"It's simply amazing," Ashe marveled. Inside, she was gleeful. That meant she could wear the beautiful silk nightgown! "Thank you so much for this, Fran."

"Don't thank me. It is your desire, manifested by the Wood." Fran looked around the room once more. "It would seem something is missing from this room, though."

Ashe looked around, puzzled. "I don't think so. Everything that I could possibly want right now is here," she said.

"Is that so?" Fran said, arching an eyebrow at the Princess.

Ashe narrowed her eyes. "What exactly are you implying?"

"We both know," Fran said simply.

Ashe didn't say anything. Fran could see that the Princess was ill-at-ease. "Goodnight, Ashe. I'll see you in the morning," she said quietly, leaving the room.

Ashe watched her go, and stared at the door for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, she shook her head, laughing at herself. He was probably in his own room, surrounded by several lusty maidens that the Wood had conjured just for his pleasure.

But that thought didn't amuse her, as she had hoped. Instead, it caused a sharp pain in her heart; a pain so sharp that she nearly yelped from it. What was happening to her? She walked to the vanity and poured herself a glass of the champagne. In a very uncharacteristic move, she downed the entire glass in one gulp and then poured another one.

She shed her clothes and carried her glass into the bathroom, where an enormous marble tub beckoned to her. She tied her hair into a bun at the nape of her neck and selected rose- and vanilla-scented bubbles for her bath. She sunk into the warm water and felt the tension melting out of her aching muscles.

She took a sip of her drink and sighed. "I do hope he's enjoying himself as much as I am," she snarked, leaning her head back and closing her eyes.

"Oh, I'd daresay I've got the better end of the bargain, here, Princess."

Ashe's eyes snapped open at the sound of his voice. There he was, standing at the doorway of _her _bathroom, watching her as though she were some sort of peep show. "What are you doing here?" she snapped.

"Come now, Princess. You know how this place works. One -- or _both_ -- of us desired it. No use arguing with the Wood, it won't likely do us any good." He smiled boyishly at her. "Besides, I can't say I'm too unhappy about the situation."

"Well, it certainly wasn't _I_ who desired this," Ashe said haughtily. "And I've a hard time believing this is your deepest desire. The Wood is simply playing some sort of elaborate joke."

"The Wood doesn't joke," Balthier said seriously. "And why is it you doubt that this is my deepest desire?"

She narrowed her eyes at him. "You can't be serious. Of all the things you could possibly want ..."

"I thought I'd made my wants perfectly clear to you," Balthier said.

Ashe swallowed hard at the look in his hazel eyes. "Oh, so I'm supposed to -- what, exactly? Let you ravish me and then watch you be on your merry way as if it never happened? Because we both know that you'd get what you want from me, and then be gone by morning."

That took Balthier aback. "Is that what you think of me?" he said. "I've dallied in the past, I won't deny it and say that I haven't. But I do know the difference between a dalliance and -- well, whatever the hell this is."

"Whatever the hell _what_ is, Balthier?" Ashe challenged.

"Look, Princess, I'll be glad to have this discussion with you, but do you think it'd be possible to do it somewhere that doesn't involve you, naked?" Balthier said, an amused twinkle in his eyes.

Ashe's eyes widened in embarrassment. "Give me a moment," she told him quietly. He bowed his head and left the bathroom. She heard him sit down on the edge of the bed in the other room, and only then did she stand and wrap herself in a large, luxuriously fluffy towel. She dried off quickly, and then pulled on the silk negligee that she had hung on the back of the bathroom door.

It was certainly made for her -- it fit like a glove. And the silk felt wonderful against her skin. It reminded her of a happier time in her life.

Suddenly, the memories came rushing back to her. Her wedding, such a joyous occasion. Only a month later, learning that both her husband and her father had been killed.

Two years. So long and so short all at once. And what had she done? Little to nothing at all. She owed it to her father to take back her crown, to restore the kingdom he'd loved so much.

And Rasler? She still saw him everywhere. He was guiding her, leading her where she needed to go. But was she to forsake everything? Surely Rasler would not want her to be alone ...

She stepped into the bedchamber where only a few dim candles burned. Suddenly, she'd never felt more alone, and the tears fell freely from her eyes. She held onto the bedpost to steady herself, and she sobbed herself into near oblivion.

It was only after she had collapsed onto the floor that she remembered that Balthier was there. He sat on the bed, silently watching her fall to pieces. "I'm -- sorry," she whispered.

"You're apologizing for being human? I think you apologize far too much, Princess."

"Ashelia," she whispered. "Would you please ... call me Ashelia?"

He stood up and crossed the room, knelt down in front of her, and tipped her tear-stained face up to look at him. "Ashelia," he said tenderly, placing his hand against her cheek.

She smiled a little then. "I think -- I think I'm all alone. I know that I'm traveling with the five of you, and you're -- wonderful. But when this is done -- I'm alone. I was never supposed to be. I was never supposed to rule _alone_. What if I can't?"

"You _can_," Balthier said firmly. "You're stronger than anyone gives you credit for -- myself included. Dalmasca will be lucky indeed to call you her Queen."

"And you? What will you call me, when this is over?"

Balthier took her hands into his own. "I shall call you Ashelia," he said sincerely.

Ashe looked at him for a long time before she pulled her hands away from his and placed them in her lap. "I thought that Rasler was it for me," she said quietly. "The 'One and Only', you know? But when your 'one and only' dies when you're just seventeen -- then what? The truth is, I loved Rasler with everything that I had. I don't know if I'll ever feel that way again. But, Balthier ... I _need_ you with _more_ than everything that I have." She looked at him, met his eyes with her own, and found the strength to stand back up.

Balthier looked up at her for a long moment before standing up to join her. "Those words carry consequences, Ashelia," he whispered.

"Yes," she told him, running her hands up the leather vest that covered his chest. "I know." She blinked back the tears that had formed in her eyes. "I'm asking you now. Kiss me ..."

"**_ASHE!_**"

Vaan's voice penetrated into Ashe's mind, and she woke with a start to find herself lying on a cot in a tiny tent of some sort. Far, far away from the serenity and beauty she had been pulled away from. "Wha -- what's going on?" she mumbled.

"You were poisoned by the Elder Wyrm." Fran's voice now.

"Elder Wyrm? But I thought -- didn't we stop to rest before fighting him? In the secret inn in the jungle?" Ashe's head felt fuzzy and strange.

"You were dreaming," Penelo said. "What's the last thing you remember?"

_Balthier_ ... Ashe thought numbly. _No, that was a dream._ She searched her memory for a genuine memory. "Leaving Eruyt Village," she finally muttered.

Fran sighed. "The Elder Wyrm's poison is strong. She won't remember the battle for several days, at least."

"Highness, thank gods you're awake," Basch said, entering the tent.

Ashe looked up at him, eyes burning with unshed tears. _It was all ... a dream? How can that be?_ "Balthier?" she asked. "Where --"

Penelo and Vaan exchanged glances. "Uh, he got pretty upset when you got hurt. Said he needed to kill stuff," Vaan said.

Ashe turned to Basch. "Will you -- get him for me, please?"

Basch nodded his head. "Yes, Highness."

"He was worried," Fran told Ashe. "I've never seen him so distressed." Ashe knew it was not Basch whom Fran was referring to. She placed a cool cloth on Ashe's forehead.

"Where are we?" Ashe asked.

"Mt. Bur-Omisace," Penelo said. "We brought you here so the Kiltias could help. We'll go see Anastasis when you feel better."

"Balthier comes," Fran said, looking outside the tent.

"Would you mind ..." Ashe began.

"Not at all. Come, Vaan, Penelo." Fran beckoned the children to follow her. Ashe heard Fran say something to Balthier, and then the tent flap opened.

"Balthier."

"You really should be more careful, Princess. You gave us all an awful fright," he said, trying to keep his tone light.

Ashe closed her eyes. "I dreamt -- of you," she said simply.

"Well, now, that's interesting," Balthier said, interest piqued. "I do hope it was a good dream."

Ashe managed a tiny smile. "It was."

"Princess, I daresay your smile gives you away," Balthier chided softly.

Her eyes flew open. "Oh, do grow up. It was a good dream because you were uncharacteristically _mature_ and_ kind_."

"Oh, you've cut me to the quick," Balthier said dramatically, placing a hand over his heart.

Ashe sat up slowly, feeling better for having seen him. "Thank you," Ashe said.

"For what?" he asked, genuinely confused.

"For more than you know."

He extended his hand to help her up. "In that case, you're welcome. I do hope that someday you'll tell me what it is I did to earn the thanks."

"Someday," she told him mysteriously.

"Shall we be off to the Gran Kiltias now?" he asked her.

"Of course. Tell the others, I'll be out in just a moment," Ashe replied. When he was outside, she sighed a little and attempted to straighten out her clothing.

It may have only been a dream. But, now, in the aftermath of the dream, she knew what it was that she wanted. All she needed was the courage to ask for it.

And in the end, it might just give her the strength she needed to get her crown back.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**A/N:** I know, I know. That was incredibly mean of me, right? ;-p


	5. The Universe and You

**A/N: **This chap is full of lemony goodness. You've been warned, please proceed with caution and maturity. XD

**_Part Five  
The Universe and You_**

The group approached the Gran-Kiltias Anastasis slowly, quietly. The old man's eyes were closed, and he didn't appear to even notice they were there.

"Is he sleeping?" Vaan asked Penelo.

"Shh!" she said sharply.

Suddenly, the old man's voice boomed out, seemingly all around them, though he didn't move his lips. "No, my child. I do not sleep. I dream. For reality and illusion are a duality, two parts of a whole. Only the mirror of dreams reflects what is true."

Ashe listened with rapt attention to the Gran-Kiltias. Certainly, he couldn't have known that she had just recently had an epiphany in the form of a dream? Still, his words struck a chord with her. She knew that her dream had been the only truth. She had to stop living the lie.

But now was not the time. Now, she had more urgent matters to attend to.

She stepped toward Anastasis. "Anastasis, Your Grace, I am Ashelia --"

"Lay down your words. Ashelia, daughter of Raminas, I have dreamt your dream. Who better to carry on the Dalmascan line than she who bears the Dawn Shard? Your dream of a kingdom restored is known to me," Anastasis said.

"Gran Kiltias, then give us your blessing," Larsa interceded. "Grant the Lady Ashe her accession—"

"I do not suppose this is something you might…reconsider?" A thickly accented voice interrupted from the back of the room. The group turned to see a tall, stylishly-dressed, dark-haired man. His eyes were covered with dark glasses, and he was accompanied by a woman dressed in dark clothing. He looked at Larsa. "Ah, my little emperor-in-waiting. You called, and I have come."

Larsa held out his hand for the man to shake, but the man instead patted Larsa on the head. Larsa brushed his hand aside in annoyance. He turned to Ashe. "This is the man I wanted you to meet. Believe it or not, he is a member of the noble House Margrace, the ruling family of the Rozarrian Empire."

The man approached Ashe, got a little closer than Ashe was comfortable with. "Hah, I am but one of very very many," he said. "Try as I might, I could not stop this war alone. Thus I've come, seeking Larsa's assistance." He took off his dark glasses, and handed them to his female servant. "Al-Cid Margrace, at your service. To think, I stand before the Lady Ashe. It is truly an honor." He knelt, took Ashe's left hand in his own and attempted to place a kiss upon it.

Ashe pulled her hand away as gracefully as she could muster, and Penelo blanched visibly at the Rozarrian's advances. Balthier stood behind the group, arms crossed in front of his chest, a look of extreme annoyance on his face.

"I see it is true, after all," Al-Cid continued. "Ah, stunning is Dalmasca's desert bloom."

"Is this guy serious?" Balthier muttered to no one in particular. Larsa made an irritated noise that perfectly mirrored Balthier's own feelings on the situation.

Anastasis spoke again. "In Archadia, Larsa. In Rozarria, Al-Cid. They dream not of war. Should empire join with empire, the way will open for a new Ivalice in our time."

"Hah, Gran Kiltias! You speak much of dreams. But in the real world, war is upon us," Al-Cid said with a slight sneer.

Ashe shook her head, unable to bear any more. She looked back at Balthier, hoping to find strength in him, but instead found him to look -- irritated. "Gran Kiltias, I was told my coming here would prevent this war. I was to assume my father's throne and announce the restoration of Dalmasca…treat with the Empire for peace, and persuade the Resistance to stay their hand. I have not come all this way to be asked to reconsider!" she cried.

"A word from you and the Resistance would stop cold…and Rozarria's pretext for joining the war…scattered, off to the four winds. This was what we had hoped. Alas, circumstances change. A full two years have passed since your reported death. Were it to become known you were still alive…I fear it could only worsen our current situation," Al-Cid remarked.

"Because I am powerless to help," Ashe said dejectedly.

"Nay! In fact, it has little to do with you," Al-Cid said quickly.

"Then what?" Larsa asked. "If Lady Ashe were to extend her hand in friendship…perhaps I could then persuade the Emperor." He turned to Ashe, imploring her with his eyes. "His Excellency will solve things peacefully—"

"The Emperor Gramis is no more," Al-Cid said suddenly. "His life has been taken."

Larsa's eyes grew wide. "Father!" He stood there, suddenly numb and unable to think or speak.

Al-Cid turned back to Ashe. "Let us suppose you approach the Empire with a peaceful resolution," he began. "The late Emperor Gramis would have lent you his ear, that much is certain. But we are dealing with Vayne Solidor. Should the Princess return, he would claim her an imposter. All to tempt the Resistance into battle. Vayne wants this war, that much is certain. As our ill luck would have it, the man is a military genius."

Anastasis nodded his concurrence. "The dreams have told me thus," he said. "To reveal yourself would imperil us all. I see war, and Vayne's name writ bold on history's page."

"Archadia's banners fly high. They are making ready for the coming war." Al-Cid's female servant handed him a scroll, which he unrolled and began to read. "According to our latest reports ... The Western Armada prepares for war, under Vayne's command no less. The newly formed 12th Fleet has already been deployed. Oh yes! The Imperial 1st Fleet stands ready. They'll be under way as the Odin's refit is complete. And there is more: the 2nd Kerwon Expeditionary Force is being called in…to replace the missing 8th, so there will be no gaps. The largest force ever seen!"

Ashe sighed heavily. "And the Nethicite is the coup de grace." Al-Cid nodded sagely, and Ashe turned back to the Gran-Kiltias. "Gran Kiltias, Your Grace. I spoke to you of my succession. Let us put that aside. Should I become Queen of Dalmasca now, powerless as I am, I can protect nothing. With a greater power at my disposal, perhaps then."

"You seek the Nethicite?" Al-Cid asked her.

She shook her head. "No, something far greater," she said firmly.

"To wield power against power. Truly the words of a Hume-child," the Gran-Kiltias remarked.

Ashe held her head high. "I am a descendent of the Dynast-King."

"Indeed. You have one choice," Anastasis said. "Seek you the other power that Raithwall left."

"Such a thing exists?" Ashe asked incredulously.

"Cross the Paramina Rift to the Stilshrine of Miriam. There rests the power you seek. The Sword of Kings ... can cut through Nethicite," Anastasis said. "Awaken Ashelia B'Nargin and take up your sword, or your dream will remain but a dream."

Ashe glanced at Larsa, eyes full of sympathy. He didn't appear to see them. He didn't appear as though he'd heard anything at all after learning of his father's murder. Penelo placed a gentle hand on his shoulder as the group left the Temple, and left Larsa behind.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"I'm simply saying I didn't like him," Balthier commented to Fran as the group made their way down the mountain to the Paramina Rift.

"And why would that be?" Fran asked innocently. "Could it be due to his interest in the Lady Ashe?" She cast a knowing look in Balthier's direction.

"_That_ has nothing to do with it," Balthier contested. "He was far too over-the-top for my liking. And I didn't appreciate the way he came in and took over the meeting." He sighed. Fran was right though. He hadn't appreciated the way the smarmy Rozarrian had just swooped in and taken to fawning all over his Ashe.

Wait a moment. _His_ Ashe? Balthier shook his head in disgust. It had simply been too long a day for him to think straight any longer.

After several hours of trekking through the snow-covered fields, Basch suggested that they rest for the night. "Lady Ashe's strength has not yet completely returned, and it has been a trying day for us all."

"Agreed," Fran said.

They began setting up the tents and starting a fire. Ashe was ordered to sit and not exert herself. Ashe wouldn't have minded some exertion. She had so much pent-up frustration from the meeting earlier. Never in her life had she felt so powerless as she did at that moment. Nothing seemed to be going according to the original plan, and it was terribly frustrating. She needed something to take her mind off of the insanity that had become this day.

Sighing, she spotted Balthier's gun lying on the ground not far from her feet. She picked it up and turned it over in her hand. She held it up and aimed it at a lone tree far in the distance. Her hand shook so badly, though that she had to bring her arm down. She marveled that Balthier's aim was always steady and true.

"Princess, if you wanted to play with my gun, all you had to do was ask," Balthier said teasingly, coming up behind her.

"I was just looking," she said.

"Look all you like. Feel free to fondle as well." He winked.

She rolled her eyes. "Bal_thier_." She looked back down at the gun and suddenly knew what she wanted to do. "Would you teach me to shoot this?" she asked him, eyes sparkling hopefully.

"You want to learn how to fire my weapon? I thought you'd never ask," Balthier quipped. "Come on, get up. Follow me. Better to get you away from the innocent bystanders." Ashe followed him across the path. He finally stopped when they were out of both earshot and eyesight of the rest of the group.

"Okay, here is good." He handed her the gun, helped her get her arms into the correct position and showed her how to get a target in her sites. "You've got to get a firmer grip on it than that, Princess, or it'll just slip right through your fingers."

Ashe grinned a little to herself at the double-entendre. Had someone walked by and heard but not seen them, she was certain they would think something untoward was going on. That gave her an idea. She tightened her hold on the gun, but not before letting her hand slide down the barrel slightly suggestively. "Like this?" she asked, feigning innocence.

Balthier eyed her suspiciously. What exactly _was_ she trying to do to him? "Perfect," he managed to croak.

"Now what?" she asked him.

"Now you need to ... uh, pump the slide," Balthier said, clearing his throat.

"Hmm, okay. Like this, then, right?" Ashe asked, looking at him while she pumped the slide. "Again?"

"No!" he cried out. "Um, no, just once will be fine for now."

"Are you all right?" she asked him sweetly.

"Princess," Balthier said warning. "What exactly are you playing at here?"

Ashe lowered the gun, bit her lip. "Trying to gain control," she finally said. "I've felt powerless all day, and it's not a feeling I'm accustomed to. I thought maybe I would feel better if I spent some time alone with you. You -- you soothe me, Balthier."

Balthier took the gun from Ashe, fired the loaded bullet at a tree stump in the distance, and clicked the safety on. He set it down on the ground and walked over to her. "I hope you realize, Princess, that by trying to gain control over me, you've nearly made me lose all of mine."

She looked up at him, her eyes a stormy gray. "Would that be so bad?" she asked him.

"What's come over you?" he asked her, his expression serious.

"I don't quite know," she said honestly. "I just needed to be alone with you."

He didn't know what to say to that, so he just took her in his arms, rested his chin on top of her head. "What do you think this all means, Ashelia?" he said quietly.

At the sound of her name on his lips, she stepped back. "You just called me Ashelia," she whispered.

"My apologies," he said quickly, afraid he'd offended her in some way.

"No, no. Call me Ashelia again," she said breathily. "Balthier, I'm _asking _you."

"Asking me?" he said, not quite sure if he understood her correctly.

She nodded. "I'm asking you. Call me Ashelia ... and ..." She didn't get to finish her sentence, for he placed one hand at the small of her back and one at the nape of her neck and drew her to him in one quick motion.

His lips found hers, and there was no sweetness in this kiss. This kiss was hungry and heady. Their tongues danced and mated with each other. Ashe tried to pull him closer, found that he could _be_ no closer without being inside of her, and groaned in frustration. She felt the knot that had been in the bottom of her stomach for two years begin to untie itself and fan flames throughout her body.

She found herself undoing the buckle of his belt without even realizing it. He removed her panties in one fluid movement and pushed her back against a large boulder. Wordlessly, he entered her, and she moved her hips to accomodate him. She pulled him closer to her as he thrust, refusing to let him go. She _needed_ this right now. Needed the simplicity, the rawness of it all. It felt so good to be wanted again, and Balthier filled her in a way she never thought be possible again.

Balthier's hands were in her hair, he placed featherlight kisses all over her face and shoulders and the exposed swell of her breasts. "Ashelia," he murmured.

The sound of his voice saying her name brought her to the edge. She wrapped her legs around his waist and urged him on -- harder, faster, gods _please_ -- until finally she came, crying out his name. He felt her spasms, squeezing him until he reached his own release.

They stayed like that for a moment, staring at each other in wonderment. "It's cold," she finally murmured. "It wasn't this cold before." She rested her head on his chest and he ran his fingers through her hair.

"I must say, I never imagined I'd be doing that in this ice field," Balthier said lightly. "It wasn't _quite_ how I envisioned our first time."

She smiled softly into his chest. "Me neither," she whispered. "But I'll take it." She paused. "I haven't felt this way in a long time. Too long."

Balthier kissed her long and hard. "Come, let's head back to camp. I'm sure the others are wondering where we've gotten off to by now," Balthier said, taking her by the hand. "I do hope you'll let me make this up to you. Somewhere more civilized."

"I would like that very much," Ashe told him as they walked back to camp. "Somewhere with a bit more sun, next time," she joked.

"Deal," he told her. "Ashe, I ..." he began, then thought better of it. . "Never mind," he said. Luckily, she didn't press the subject.Now was not the time nor the place to be burdening her with his darkest secrets. Not in the afterglow.

But soon, he'd tell her. He only hoped she wouldn't think less of him for it ...


	6. Beautiful Dawn

**_Part Six  
Beautiful Dawn _**

The Stilshrine of Miriam was cold, dank, and nearly impossible to navigate. There was a maddening puzzle to solve before the party could even continue deeper into the cloister. And what was their reward for solving the puzzle? A battle with the powerful Esper, Mateus.

The battle was hard-fought, and by the time they finally bested the fell scion, Ashe felt as though her lungs might explode. Like her body might fall apart. But then Balthier placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, and nodded his head. "It's all right," he told her gently, gesturing to the doorway they had revealed after the fight. The way was now open for her to enter the Vault of the Champion, where the Sword of Kings waited for her.

Sure enough, at the end of the long corridor was a glowing apparatus, sheltering the mighty sword. Ashe walked to it as though in a trance, and as she approached, the Dawn Shard began to glow. The Sword of Kings fell to the floor with a clatter. She bent to pick it up, surprised by its weight. She needed both hands to wield it.

"You should try it on the Dawn Shard," Vaan suggested, nodding at the stone. "See if it can destroy nethicite, or not."

"What?" Ashe said, slightly perplexed.

"He just might be on to something," Balthier said. Ashe turned to him, giving him her full attention. "After all, The Dawn Shard's no use to us any more," he finished with a shrug and a small smile, only for her benefit.

Ashe nodded and set the Shard on the floor. It was reacting in a very strange manner. "The stone bleeds mist," Ashe concluded.

Fran nodded. "It has been roused. It fears the sword."

Suddenly, Rasler's visage appeared as though coming out of the nethicite. Ashe gasped a little, and Balthier looked, but to no avail. He couldn't see whatever -- or _whomever_ -- it was she saw.

Ashe stared at Rasler, and he shook his head sadly, and his body disappeared. Brow furrowed, Ashe lifted the sword and attempted to strike the stone with it. She missed, the sword clanging against the stone floor loudly. Rasler's image reappeared, and again he shook his head. His body faded again, and the Dawn Shard stopped glowing.

"The Stone is quiet," Fran remarked.

"This is the sword," Ashe said, feeling awed by the power coursing through her. "The Nethicite destroyer."

"Should it find its mark," Balthier added, taking a small jab at Ashe's less than stellar aim. Ashe shot him a warning Look.

"Vaan," Ashe said, before he could walk away. "Tell me, did you see him?"

"I didn't. Not a thing. Not even my brother. Not ... _anything_," Vaan said honestly.

Balthier overheard the exchange and frowned. _Vaan_ had seen Ashe's ghostly visitor? He had no idea why the thought irritated him so, but it did, nonetheless.

Ashe nodded and the party exited the Vault and headed toward the Stilshrine's entrance. They walked outside, and Balthier noticed Fran's nose twitching. "Fran ..." he said slowly.

Suddenly, the viera gasped. "There!" She pointed toward the Mountain.

"Smoke?" Vaan asked, alarm in his voice.

"What could it mean?" Fran asked, more to herself than to anyone else.

The group hurried back to Mt. Bur-Omisace in record time. When they got there, the scene was dismal. The pilgrims and refugees who had come to the mountain for aid looked battleworn and tired. The party hurried up the many staircases leading to the Hall of Light.

Ashe gasped in horror at what she saw when they entered. The Hall was in ruins. There were corpses strewn everywhere she looked. Judge Bergan stood before one of the corpses, and he was eager to fight.

"Ah, our vagrant princess," he said with disdain. "Swift has your lust for revenge led you to the Sword of Kings." He stepped aside, revealing that the corpse behind him was none other than Anastasis. Ashe's eyes widened in shock. "You will surrender the sword to me," Bergan continued. "Too late, and to their sorrow do those who misplace their trust in gods learn their fate."

A ghostly demon appeared behind Bergan as he approached the Princess. His body began emanating a strange ribbon of spiritual colors.

"Fran, I don't like the look of that," Balthier said uneasily.

"The Mist!" Fran cried. "He holds a stone! It controls him, as it did Mjrn!"

"No. No, the power of Manufacted Nethicite is the power of Man! A weapon forged by his wisdom…who would challenge the gods themselves! A fitting blade for a true Dynast-King. Raithwall did but pretend the title…a cur begging Nethicite scraps from his master's table. Hark! Ivalice hails her true Dynast-King, Vayne Solidor! He shall defy the will of the gods, and see the reins of History back in the hands of Man! His time is nigh! The new Ivalice holds no place for the name Dalmasca. The stain of Raithwall's blood…shall be washed clean from history's weave!" Bergan laughed maniacally and unsheathed his sword.

Ashe and her allies fought tooth and nail, and had very nearly taken him down, when he suddenly lunged at the Princess, grabbed her, and pressed his blade against the side of her neck. With a terrified expression, she sought Balthier's face, begging him with her eyes to save her.

Balthier stood, frozen in place, unsure of what to do. He'd never been one to lock up in battle, but then, he'd never had to face the realization that someone he -- that someone he _cared_ for a great deal might soon die if he didn't act quickly. And he froze.

Luckily, Basch had kept his wits about him, and with a vicious snarl, he drove his spear into the demented Judge's side. The Judge crumpled, and his grasp on Ashe loosened. She fell to her knees, gasping and wheezing in as she tried to gather her courage and strength again. She could hardly stand the fact that this _Judge_ had reduced her to nothing more than a damsel in distress.

Her eyes found Balthier's, and she could see the hurt and humiliation in them. She didn't understand at all. She had thought he would protect her from anything, but in the moment, he'd done _nothing_. Perhaps she had been mistaken -- and that thought cut her deeper than any blade.

When Ashe was able to stand again, they checked the bodies lying about for any sign of life, and found none.

"Wait!" Penelo said in a panic. "What about Larsa?"

"Gone. Spirited away by Judge Gabranth." Al-Cid's voice came from behind them. They turned, and saw the Rozarrian leaning against his female servant.

"So, he was here," Basch said bemusedly. Ashe sensed that he wasn't speaking of Larsa, but she didn't press the subject.

"As for our young lordling," Al-Cid continued as his aide helped him to sit down, "he left -- to avoid trouble, you see. But Judge Bergan had other ideas. He flew into a rage, and I was left to fend for myself." He turned his attention to Ashe. "Please, Princess, you must permit me to take you back to Rozarria."

Balthier felt his anger start to bubble, but Fran placed a hand on his shoulder, as if she could sense his distress.

"So that you can protect me?" Ashe asked, not unkindly, kneeling before the wounded man.

"I would lay down my life at a single word to be sure -- but I harbor no maundering delusions of valiant grandeur. Vayne has our War Pavilion jumping at shadows. They favor a pre-emptive strike. But you—you will convince them otherwise. You will see that they do not start this war," Al-Cid explained.

Ashe gave long pause, and for a frightening moment, Balthier thought she would actually consider going with this buffoon. But she shook her head. "Forgive me. This I cannot do. My errand here is not yet done. I must wield the Sword of Kings, and with it, bring an end to the Dusk Shard."

"Do you even know where this stone is?" Al-Cid asked her.

Balthier stepped forward, eager to cut into their little one-on-one. "I could venture a guess. The Draklor Laboratories, in Archades. The Empire's weapon research begins and ends there." He approached Ashe. "How soon do we leave?"

Ashe regarded him solemnly before speaking. "At once." She turned to Al-Cid. "As for matters in Rozarria ... I wish you luck."

Al-Cid left then, and Ashe was silent for a long time before she spoke. "How do you propose we reach Archades?" Her voice was cool, bordering on indifferent. "Her borders will be well guarded for fear of Rozarrian invasion. We dare not approach by air."

"And the navy will ensure that the coast is watched as well. No, we'll go on foot, through the Salikawood. The easiest route is to head north from Nalbina," Balthier added.

"There's a Hunter's Camp just outside the Salikawood," Fran said. "Patrols there will be sparse, so we shan't rest until we reach it."

Ashe nodded. "Let's go, then."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The Mosphoran Highwaste was rugged and treacherous. About four hours in, they reached a small encampment. "Please, can we rest for just a minute?" Penelo asked.

Fran nodded. "It will do us good, I think," she said. "The Salikawood is not far, though, so we shouldn't dally too long."

Penelo nodded earnestly, and sat down on a large boulder. Vaan stood near the rock, and they conversed quietly amongst themselves.

Fran stood off toward the exit of the camp, scanning the horizon, and Basch looked please to have a moment's respite.

Ashe walked over to a waterless fountain, and stared off into the distance. Balthier walked up behind her, cleared his throat. "Princess, if I didn't know better, I'd say you were angry with me," he ventured cautiously.

Ashe turned, looked at him coldly. "Well, you get points for intuitition, at least," she sneered.

"What's wrong?" Balthier asked.

She sighed, threw up her hands. "I put much value in the fact that I need not be protected by anyone. You know that. I'm proud of the fact that I can take care of myself, and I've done a damn fine job of it these past two years.

"But, Balthier. Earlier, when Judge Bergan had me -- I _needed_ you then. And you did nothing." He opened his mouth to speak, but she held up her hand to silence him. "No. It's I who is the the idiot here. I presumed far too much into the depth of your feelings. I was just another conquest. You got what you wanted, didn't you? I made it frightfully easy for you, because I thought --"

"Ashe," Balthier said, truly stricken. "Is that really how you see this situation?"

"If I meant _anything_ to you, you would have tried to save me, instead of just staring." Ashe blinked back the tears angrily. She would be damned if she'd let him see her cry. Her fingertips brushed the spot on her neck where the blade had been. "If he'd put just a little more pressure ..."

"Ashe, please, stop," Balthier said. "I didn't do anything because the moment I saw the fear in your eyes, _I _got frightened. I feared you might actually die, right in front of me, and that I would be powerless to stop it from happening. Yes, Princess, I, the leading man, froze. I did nothing. But it wasn't because I feel _nothing_ for you, it's because I feel ev ..." He stopped suddenly. He couldn't allow himself to finish that sentence. Not now, not yet -- maybe not ever.

He didn't have to. She saw the sincerity in his eyes and was humbled. "All right, then," she said quietly. "That's all I needed to know." She reached up to touch his face, but the sound of a throat being cleared behind her made her jump.

She turned around, and found herself face-to-face with a stony-eyed Basch. "I sincerely hope I'm interrupting something," he said gruffly.

"Basch," Balthier said, in a hurry to smooth the ruffled feathers.

"This is the _princess of Dalmasca_," Basch hissed. "What made you even _think _..."

"I did," Ashe interrupted him. "It's not his fault, Basch, and I won't have you stand here and chastise him as though he's done something inexcusable."

"Highness, with all due respect, he_ has_," Basch said. "If you'd give us a minute?"

Ashe stood firm. "Whatever you're going to say to him, you should say to me as well. I'm as much a part of all this."

"I don't understand why you would protect this -- _pirate_," Basch sneered. "We _trusted _you, Balthier. And this is how you show your loyalty?"

"I never pledged loyalty to anyone," Balthier contested, completely unfazed by Basch's outburst. He knew it wasn't personal, and he could see how the situation might look to one sworn to protect and serve Ashe.

"Ah, that's right," Basch remarked sarcastically. "You're only in it for the treasure. And what better treasure for you than a Princess."

"That's _enough_, Basch," Ashe said coldly. "I'm going to say it again, Balthier has done nothing -- nothing that I didn't allow him to do. _Please_, Basch. Just ... leave him be." She looked at Balthier, nodded a little. He understood immediately and took his leave.

"Highness, I must remind you of your mission. Your duty to your country," Basch said in a low, firm voice after Balthier was gone.

"Every day for the last two years, I've thought of naught else," Ashe said steadily. "Dalmasca, duty, taking down the Empire -- these have been my driving forces. They've kept me going. But -- I can't ignore the duty to myself any longer. Am I not as important as my kingdom?" She shook her head. "Since Rasler, there has been no one else. I never even wanted to entertain the possibilty. If I had never met Balthier, we wouldn't be having this conversation. But I did meet him, and we _are_ having this conversation. I can't change these things. And even if I _could_, I wouldn't want to. He makes me feel ..."

"What, Highness?" Basch asked, his tone softer now.

She smiled a little. "That's it. He makes me feel. You aren't going to punish him for _that_, now, are you?"

Basch simply shook his head and let her go. For now, she seemed to be the Ashelia he'd remembered from so long ago. With any luck, whatever this was would simple fizzle out. He didn't imagine it would have gotten too serious so soon.

And he never would have imagined that the two people he stood watching now were two people who were slowly, unconsciously falling in love with one another.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

They reached the Phon Coast several hours later, after trekking through the southernmost part of the Salikawood, and rounding up a bunch of lazy moogles to repair a broken gate.

"Ahh, the beach," Penelo said with a happy sigh. She and Vaan ran off toward the water, laughing and squealing like children. Fran and Basch went to look into securing new weapons for the group. Balthier and Ashe headed down the beach, away from the others.

Ashe had noticed the far-off look in Balthier's eyes. It had been there ever since the Mosphoran Highwaste. So absorbed was she in whatever it was that was bothering him, that she tripped over a stone in her path. Luckily, Balthier grabbed her by the hand before she fell face-first into the sand.

"Thank you," she said quietly, as he walked up to the water's edge.

Sensing he wanted to be alone, she turned to go.

"Why the capital?" His voice gave her pause, and she looked at him, confused.

"You said Draklor was there -- the Nethicite ... I must destroy it." She was perplexed. He _knew_ all of this already.

"You sure you don't want it for yourself?"

Ashe gasped, shocked. "Balthier ..."

"Use the nethicite's power to restore Dalmasca -- something like that? The best intentions invite the worst kinds of trouble," he said.

Ashe sensed his distress. _Something_ was weighing heavily on his mind -- the question remained -- did he trust her enough to share it? She decided to test it. "Lusting for ever greater power, blinded by the Nethicite," she said haughtily. "That's not _truly_ how you see me after all this, is it?"

"That does sound like someone I know," Balthier said wistfully. "You think you know someone, but then, Nethicite ..." He gave himself a mental shake. It wasn't fair, passing these judgments upon Ashe, when it was someone else who troubled him. He would tell her. Now. She needed to know -- she'd _earned_ the right to know.

"He was obsessed with Nethicite. It was all he cared about. He'd babble nonsense, blind to aught but the Stone's power. He'd talk about some 'Eynah,' or was it 'Venat'? No matter. Everything he did, he did to get closer to the Nethicite, to understand it. He made airships, weapons… He even made me a Judge."

Ashe's eyes widened in complete surprise. "You -- were a _Judge_?" she gasped.

"Part of a past I'd rather forget. It didn't last long. I ran. I left the Judges…and him. Cidolfus Demen Bunansa. Draklor Laboratory's very own Doctor Cid. That's when he lost his heart to Nethicite, lost himself. And I suppose that's when I lost my father." He turned to Ashe then, placed his hands firmly on her shoulders. "Please. Don't follow in his footsteps."

Ashe said nothing, just stared at the man before her in wonderment. This -- this explained so much.

"I ran away," he continued. "I couldn't stand seeing him like that -- a slave to the Stone. So I ran. Free at last." He snorted derisively. "Funny I went for the Dusk Shard. How was I to know it was Nethicite? And then, of course, I met you ..." His expression warmed slightly as he looked at her. "All that running, and I got nowhere. It's time to end this, cut my ties to the past."

Ashe touched his cheek softly. "It's hard to leave the past behind, I know," she said, thinking of Rasler. "I'm trying."

"The choice is yours to make, Princess," Balthier said quietly. "But don't give your heart to a stone. I couldn't bear to lose another ... and you're too strong for that."

"My heart to a stone?" Ashe asked, amused. "You don't have to worry about that. I gave my heart to another a long time ago. And I'm finally starting to get it back -- if I decide to give it away again -- you'll be the first to know." She smiled up at him, amazed at the rush of feelings that had come over her after his confession.

"In that case, I have a request," Balthier said in his usual charming fashion.

"What's that?" Ashe asked him, glad to see the twinkle back in his eyes.

"Might I beg a kiss from the Lady?"

Her smile widened. "Yes, please."


	7. Twilight

**A/N:** Nothing but a lemon here, folks. No, really, that's all this chapter is. Enjoy! XD

**_Part Seven  
Twilight_**

It took the party several more days to reach Archades, and then nearly a full day after that, running around, gathering something called "chops" -- enough to take the taxi to Tsenoble, where Balthier waited.

Yes, Balthier had left them upon their arrival in the Imperial City, citing "business". Ashe wondered if it had something to do with that man, Jules -- or perhaps it was his father?

The trip to the city had been trying. First, there were the Tchita Uplands and the ungodly amount of snakes to fight through. Then, there were the caves -- the Sochen Cave Palace, rather. Followed by Old Archades, which much reminded Ashe of Rabanastre's Lowtown -- dismal, depressing, and dark.

But now, there were finally in the city. It was nearing dusk when they reached Tsenoble. Balthier stood on the taxi platform, arms folded over his chest in irritation. "Decide to take in the sights, did you?" he asked Vaan.

"Balthier, be nice," Ashe chided. "We had to gather enough chops to ride the taxi."

"What?" Balthier snapped. "I gave Jules chops enough for all of you -- why, that ..." Ashe put her hand on his arm to calm him.

"Not now," she told him wearily. "We're all tired. Is there a place we can stay tonight?"

His features softened as he glanced at her. She looked terribly exhausted, and he had to admit, he was dying for a bath, himself. No sense in storming Draklor when they were dead on their feet. Besides, this would afford them a rare opportunity to be alone.

"The Lady has a point," he said. "We'll stay at The Archadian tonight." The Archadian was one of the city's finer hotels, perhaps a bit extravagant for their budget, but the luxury might do them all good.

The party gratefully followed Balthier to the hotel. Penelo sighed happily when she saw the lobby. "It's so _nice_," she commented. "Can we afford this?"

"For one night, we can afford it," Balthier told her with a reassuring wink. He walked to the reception desk and checked them in. He returned to the party and distributed key cards. "Vaan, Penelo, here you are. Fran, Basch -- I trust this won't be a problem? Get plenty of rest. We shall need it for the day ahead." No one argued with him. Even Basch said nothing, though he knew where the Princess would be sleeping that night.

Ashe sank gratefully onto a chaise lounge once inside the room. She kicked off her boots and wiggled her toes. Then she pulled off her shin- and wrist-guards and tossed them aside. "This room is beautiful," she sighed. "This hotel is beautiful."

"Don't get accustomed to it. This may be the last bit of luxury we're like to see for a very long while," Balthier said while he pulled off his own boots.

"It's appreciated," Ashe said simply. She then laughed nervously. "I'm sorry. I seem to be rather nervous, but I -- don't know why."

Balthier stood before her, and pulled her to her feet. "I rather like that I make you nervous," he told her, still holding her hand.

"I'm sure you do," she said dryly. Sighing, she pulled her hands away from Balthier's and worked at removing the ornate chestpiece she wore as part of her armor. Setting it aside, she rolled her neck back and forth, trying to work out the kinks.

Balthier turned her around so that her back was to him, and began rubbing her neck and shoulders. She sighed blissfully. His fingers were _magic_ on her aching muscles. Suddenly, she felt him untying her blouse and slipping it off her shoulders. His lips followed his fingertips, and her heart began to pound. She turned around and wasted no time in removing his vest and shirt. She ran her hands up the bare flesh of his finely sculpted torso. He removed his trousers, and Ashe's breath caught when she saw him in all of his glory -- and there was a _lot_ of glory to see, for he was hard as stone already.

He finished removing her shirt and the rest of her garments in record time. She stood before him, pale and naked in the candlelight, chest heaving, eyes the color of a stormy sky. "Ashelia," he murmured before he captured her lips with his own.

She gasped when she felt his erection against her thigh. "Balthier," she moaned as he kissed a line down her neck. Slowly, he lowered her onto the bed, and positioned himself above her. He took both her wrists in one of his hands and held them above her head.

She squirmed a bit, as though she meant to get away, but he held her firm. "Oh, no you don't," he whispered hotly in her ear. "Princess you may be, but _I'm _in charge here." He lowered his mouth to her breasts, flicked his tongue over her taut pink nipples. He relished her taste, the sounds she made, the silk of her skin ... He looked up at her face, saw that her eyes were closed; her expression one of pure rapture.

He kissed her lips while his fingers found her core. She was hot and wet, and when he slid his fingers inside, her hips bucked against his hand, urging him on. "Oh, gods, yes, please," she said breathily. He flicked his thumb over her clit and she whimpered. "Balthier, please. _Now._"

He wasn't ready to give into her yet. He still had more he wanted to do to the Princess in his bed. He released her wrists and lowered his head. Ashe's eyes flew open in shock when she felt his tongue flick over where his thumb had just been. He licked and sucked rhythmically, half mad with the taste and scent of her surrounding him, until he felt her entire body spasm violently. She tangled her fingers in his hair and pulled him up to look him in the eyes. "You -- have to -- be inside me. _Now_!" she cried out. "Please, oh, gods."

It was all he needed. He slid himself into her. She cried out as he filled her, her eyes overflowing with the tears of ecstasy.

"Harder!" she urged him. He did as she asked, and she moved underneath him, forcing him deeper inside. He felt her come again, and it was enough to push him over the edge. He cried out as he felt the sweetest release he'd ever known.

He collapsed on top of her, and she stroked his back absently, smiling in the afterglow. It was the first time in gods-knew-how-long that she was truly happy. "Balthier," she whispered, without even realizing that she'd done so.

Balthier rolled off of the Princess carefully, but kept her in his arms, spooning her from behind. "I hope that makes up for what happened on the Rift," he said softly into her sweetly-scented hair.

She shivered at the touch. "Hmmm," she murmured devilishly. "I don't know. Perhaps we should do it again, just to make sure?"

Balthier laughed. "The pleasure will be all mine," he told her, playfully nipping her earlobe with his teeth. "But I'm afraid you'll have to give me just a minute."

"Oh, I don't know about that," she said. Slyly, she rolled him onto his back. She slid the entire length of her body down his. She slid her tongue over his shaft, took the very tip of him into her mouth. It didn't take long before he was more than ready for another go. He started to sit up, but she pushed him back down. "Oh, no you don't," she said, shaking her head firmly. "_I'm_ in charge now."

As she straddled him, filled herself with him yet again, she knew that this was all there was. There might be war on the horizon, but here and now -- this was all that _truly _mattered. And this was where she belonged.


	8. Revelations

**A/N:** This chapter is, as the title suggests, one of revelations. True feelings start to come to light, and all that good stuff. It's not terribly exciting, but it helps lay the foundation of what's to come. I hope you all enjoy it. And thanks so much to everyone who has reviewed so far! It means so much to me!

**_Part Eight  
Revelations_**

Ashe woke up the next morning, feeling as refreshed as she would had she slept for _days_ instead of just mere hours the night before. Smiling to herself, she remembered why it was that she had gotten so little sleep the previous eve. She would have changed nothing.

Looking to her left, she saw him, still sound asleep, looking as peaceful as she'd ever seen him. She ran her fingertip along his jawline softly and curled into his side, unwilling to get out of the bed and greet the rest of her day. If only time could stop, just for a little while, just for _them_.

Every day led her closer and closer to -- what, she didn't know. But closer to something. And she knew in her heart if she kept walking this path, with her five companions, she would in time reclaim her throne, and her old life. As much as she longed for a free Dalmasca, and all that she would gain with it ... she knew she would also be losing immeasurably when that day came.

She would be Queen. Queens did not consort with thieves or ... or pirates. The thought had her sitting up in bed, clutching the sheets to her chest and fighting for air. She hadn't thought about it when this had all started. This wasn't supposed to happen at all. These ... people ... they were only supposed to help her! She was never supposed to get involved with them, never supposed to _care_.

Never supposed to fall in love.

The revelation of that hit her with such a force that she nearly choked. _In love? No ... not in love. I couldn't possibly be ..._ But her eyes drifted to the man sharing her bed, and she knew it was true. For better or worse, she had found the One. No, Rasler had been the One ... Balthier was ... Balthier was ...

_Everything_.

But he could be _nothing_ to a Queen.

Balthier woke to the sound of Ashe's forced and labored breathing. He looked at her quizically, saw the frantic look in her eyes, and immediately sat up, wrapping his arms around her. "What is it, Ashe? What's the matter?" he said softly, soothing, like you would to a child.

"I -- I'm going to be Queen," she whispered.

"If the gods deem it so, then yes," Balthier said slowly, not following her. Wasn't this a _good_ thing?

"No. Balthier. I'll be _Queen_. Queen Ashelia B'Nargin Dalmasca. It's what I've dreamed of, for two years. It's everything I've wanted, everything I've worked for ... and it scares me to death," she whispered.

"Well, you'd hardly be considered normal if it _didn't _scare you, Princess," Balthier replied calmly, still not following his Princess.

"Queens do not consort with pirates," she said quietly, sadly, and suddenly he understood.

He turned her to face him and looked her deep in the eyes. "We can't worry about all that now, Ashelia. We've got to make it through all this other nonsense first. Then we can worry about what happens next." He paused, almost afraid to say the next bit. "Unless you'd rather walk away right now? Perhaps pretend it never happened?"

The frightened look in her eyes said what her voice could not. "NO!" they practically screamed at him. After a long pause, she shook her head. "No," she finally said, smiling at him ever-so-slightly. "Not yet."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Less than two hours later, the party met in the lobby of the Archadian. Everyone seemed well-rested and relaxed. Everyone, save Ashe. She seemed uncharacteristically keyed-up and nervous. Penelo assumed she was apprehensive about breaking into Draklor. It would be understandable. She herself had doubts, and she was far more accustomed to such behavior than Ashe.

The party made their way across the Tsenoble district until they reached the Laboratory. "It seems quiet," Basch remarked off-handedly.

Ashe looked around, studying the surroundings, trying to sense whatever it was Basch was sensing. She didn't have a clue as to what to look for, though.

Balthier's keen eyes narrowed. "Passing strange ... There are _supposed_ to be guards here."

Vaan shrugged, ever-cheerful. "Maybe we're just lucky?"

Balthier eyed him. "Maybe _you're _just optimistic."

Basch nodded. "Something may be afoot. We proceed with caution," he said firmly.

Balthier shook his head, aggravated beyond reason. The morning's conversation with Ashe had unnerved him. He usually knew what was going to happen -- he always had a plan for everything. Usually, he would bed the object of his current infatuation, and the infatuation would go away. The chase _was_ the fun, after all. But with Ashe ... with Ashe, it was different. The longer he was near her, the more he wanted, the more he _needed_. She had become a sort of craving for him. He was unaccustomed to it, and it was quite unsettling.

The fact that she was forbidden fruit wasn't really helping matters, either. He did so love breaking the rules.

"No time for caution!" he said carelessly. "Step to it. Cid's chambers are on the top level." He grabbed Ashe by the hand and pulled her into the building, the others close behind.

Apparently they were not the first "visitors" to Cid's office that day. "Someone lacking manners has been here," Fran sniffed, looking around the quarters that were in complete disarray.

"Someone after the Nethicite?" Vaan ventured.

Ashe walked around the office, running her fingers along books and volumes absently. Balthier stood at the desk, rifling through the research notes, talking to himself as if there was no one else in the room. "The Jagd Difohr was it? Six years, and ever since you got back, this … What madness found you there?"

Ashe walked up to him, placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. As much as she knew she should be distancing herself, she just couldn't bring herself to do it. Like a moth to a flame, she was drawn to him, and she wondered, much to her chagrin, if it would always be that way.

Suddenly, there were sounds from below -- guards. "Up! Above us! Drop bulkheads five and eight! Be to it!"

Vaan looked at Fran, panic in his blue eyes. "They found us!"

She shook her head. "His earlier visitors, most likely," she assured him. We should lie low for now."

But Balthier shook his head. "No. We'll use their confusion. We've got to find Cid. Now." There was fire, venom behind his hazel eyes, and his hand clamped around Ashe's as though he were asking her for strength. She only hoped she had enough to give.

The group fought through the Imperial guards up to the 70th floor. Upon reaching the landing, they were immediately assaulted by a hulking bald man with bushy white sideburns. He lunged at Basch, his double swords glinting as he went in for the strike. Basch blocked his attacks expertly and knocked him back.

The man righted himself, and then bowed his head slightly. "My apologies," he said. "You bear not the stench of Cid's lackeys."

"And you are ... the earlier visitor?" Basch supplied, arms crossed, eyeing the man warily.

The voice of Dr. Cidolfus Demen Bunansa broke into their conversation. "Ah, yes, a valuable man. One I'd sooner not lose. Yet he knows too much."

The bald man glowered in the direction of the staircase leading up, where one could presume Dr. Cid waited. Ashe swore she heard him growl under his breath. He took off up the stairs, and with little hesitation, the others followed.

Dr. Cid was at one end of an enormous, circular room. Ashe couldn't help but find it quite striking -- the resemblence between father and son. If only the father weren't mad with power ...

"Cid!" the strange man bellowed. "You _know_ Deifacted Nethicite brought down the _Leviathan_. How can you persist with this folly?"

Cid laughed slightly. "And you've come to stop me? I'd fain to see you try."

"Mind your bones, Old Man," Balthier said coolly. "You're outmatched."

"Ah, pirate scum of the skies," Cid snarled. "What brings you here?"

"Treasure," Balthier continued, undeterred by his father's glower. "What else would a pirate want? We'll take the Dusk Shard."

Cid laughed uproariously. "You've come for _that_ trinket? And here, I thought you above all that!" Suddenly his eyes honed in on the girl whose hand Balthier was clinging to. "Hm? What's that?" He seemed to be talking to himself. "Ahh, the Princess of Dalmasca, come to visit? She's certainly not without merit," he said with a meaningful look at his son. "A test of sorts for our Princess?" Again, he said it to someone no one else could see.

Ashe glared. "You're a babbling fool," she spat.

"A trial for Ashelia B'Nargin Dalmasca!" Cid roared. Then he lowered his tone, as though he were speaking only to Ashe. "You lust for the stone's power, do you not?"

Ashe said nothing, but felt Balthier's grip tighten around her hand. She sighed in anger, frustration.

"Lend him not your ears, M'Lady," the bald stranger said. "He means to use you."

At that moment, Cid jumped from his platform, his body seemingly burning with power. Four rooks circled him, attacking the party menacingly, whilst Cid stood behind them, using them as a shield.

One of the rooks swung out erratically and sent Ashe flying into the far wall. She crumpled unconsciously on the floor. Balthier made to move for her, but Fran stopped him with a hand on his arm. "It's Manufacted Nethicite," she said quietly, nodding at Penelo as she spoke. Penelo immediately went to Ashe and began casting Curaga. Basch stood like a sentinel over the two women. "Like Bergan. You, Vaan, and I will stop him, and they will tend to her."

Balthier nodded at Fran, then clenched his fists, and turned to his father. "How could you do this?" he demanded. "How could you fall this far?"

Cid merely laughed. Vaan swung his sword at a Rook and knocked it out, leaving Cid partially defenseless. "Always hiding behind your toys," Balthier sneered. "Pity if something were to happen to them." He, Fran, and Vaan finished off the Rooks and then began attacking Cid himself.

Cid finally fell, dropping his two machine guns and kneeling on the floor. The stranger took a running leap toward him, presumably to finish him off, but was knocked back by an invisible force. Miraculously, he managed to land on his feet.

Suddenly, a terrifying demonic creature appeared behind Doctor Cid. "Venat, you shouldn't have," Cid said.

"This creature ... this is your Venat?" Balthier asked, staring at the ghostly apparition in wonderment and horror. Just as quickly as it had appeared, it was gone.

Cid shook his head, looked back at Ashe, who was now back on her feet, only a little shaky and worse for the wear. Balthier thanked the gods that Penelo had been studying her healing magicks so much lately.

"Ashelia B'Nargin Dalmasca!" Cid boomed out. "Just how far will you go for power? Does your lust for Nethicite consume you?"

Ashe looked at him, her chin set at its familiar haughty level. She would not justify his babblings with a response.

"Am I right? I _am_, aren't I?" Cid continued. "You would do well to go to Giruvegan. Who knows? You may receive a new stone for your trouble." A hover drone appeared then, and Cid boarded it.

"Your words mean _nothing_ to me!" Ashe screamed, angry now, and scared. Was he right? Would she too, end up just like him if she continued on this quest?

"The reins of History back in the hands of Man!" Cid replied. "I, too, make for Giruvegan. Give chase, if you dare it!" And then he was gone.

Balthier's hands fisted yet again. "Hate it when he does that," he muttered. Then he made haste to Ashe's side. "You are all right?" He took both of her hands into his.

Ashe smiled at him tenderly. "I am fine, if not a little angry. I can't believe ... _that's_ your father."

Balthier chuckled a bit. "Sometimes it's a stretch for me, as well."

The stranger approached them then. "Mayhaps you think me remiss," he began. "The Lady Ashe of Dalmasca?" Ashe nodded, a curious expression on her face. "I am the Sky Pirate Reddas, at your employ." He bowed deeply.

"Yes?" Ashe said.

"I would have you and your party accompany me to Balfonheim Port. I have information that you may be interested in," Reddas said.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

They went to Reddas' manse in Balfonheim, discussing with him the Resistance, the Marquis Ondore, and their next destination. They agreed to go to Giruvegan, though Reddas seemed to have misgivings.

"Not coming, Reddas?" Balthier asked, slightly challenging. He never trusted other pirates, it tended to end badly. "Forget your precious Nethicite already?"

Reddas simply shook his head. "Cid's words rang hollow to me. I shall follow another course," he said.

"Ah, another lead, then," Balthier surmised. "You're well-informed."

"I could well say the same to you, Pirate," Reddas retorted.

Vaan appeared then. "Hurry it up, Balthier, or we'll leave without you."

Balthier sighed and headed toward the door. "Fly first, ask questions later," Reddas quipped. "Your apprentice is more pirate than you."

"I don't have an apprentice," Balthier said sourly. He motioned for Ashe to follow him, and she began to.

"Princess Ashe." Reddas' voice stopped her. "I would hear your heart. If Doctor Cid has spoke the truth, you may well be rewarded with more Nethicite in Giruvegan. Tell me: do you still desire the stone?"

Ashe paused, thoughtful. "I desire its power. I want ... yet I also fear," she said after some contemplation. " I must protect Dalmasca. I can't afford to fear anything." Unwittingly, her mind drifted back to that morning ... now seeming so long ago. Her duty was to Dalmasca, she couldn't falter. She couldn't let her fears -- be they about Nethicite, or a certain Sky Pirate -- blind her.

"Do not forget Nabudis," Reddas said warningly. "That is my only counsel for you."

Ashe nodded and took her leave. Balthier waited for her outside the manse. "What did he say?" he asked her.

"He told me not to forget Nabudis," Ashe said solemnly. "I shan't."

"Come along," Balthier said gently. "Let us eat and then get some rest. We leave for Giruvegan on the morrow."

The party spoke to three of Reddas' most trusted "men" (one of whom was a woman, the other being a moogle, and the final being an actual "man"), and they were informed that they would need to travel through the dreaded Feywood and solve a mystifying puzzle to reach the ancient, holy city of Giruvegan.

When the party arrived at the Whitecap, Balfonheim's local pub and inn, Ashe sank into a chair with exhaustion and ordered an enormous amount of food, which she proceeded to devour. The rest of the party ate their own meals and watched her in utter amazement.

"Wow. I didn't know Princesses could eat that much," Vaan said simply.

Ashe sighed. "Leave me alone, Vaan," she said irritably. "It's been a terribly long day." She delicately wiped her mouth with a napkin, and pushed away from the table. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to bed." She placed a hand on Balthier's shoulder before leaving.

He placed a hand over hers. "I'll be along shortly," he told her, and she nodded. She headed up the stairs and prepared to pamper herself with a nice long bath.

Basch, Vaan, and Penelo all soon claimed exhaustion as well, and headed up to their own rented rooms. Fran and Balthier sat in companionable silence for several minutes before Fran spoke. "Balthier. Tell me, what will you do when she is Queen?"

Balthier eyed his long-time companion warily. "I haven't much thought about it," he answered honestly. "Right now, I just want to see that she makes it to the throne in one piece."

"But you care about her," Fran pressed.

He took a long drink of his ale and avoided looking at the viera, wondering if he should play it off as nothing, just another girl, or if he should confess it all. Fran was the one person who wouldn't judge him, either way.

"Balthier." Her tone was warning, bordering on cool.

"I haven't thought about it," he repeated, quieter this time, "because it hurts too damn much. All right?" he said challengingly. "Is that want you wanted to hear?"

"Yes," Fran said matter-of-factly. "I told you she couldn't be another one of your conquests ..."

"Fran, damn it, I know that. She wasn't ... isn't."

"If you'd let me finish," Fran said evenly, "I would have said that I told you she couldn't be another of your conquests. _Not_ that you couldn't have a relationship with her. The way you looked at her when you took Rasler's ring said it all. You took it because you didn't want to see her sad. I was worried for you then -- since when does Balthier care if anyone is sad or not? -- and I worry for you now. Tell me, Balthier. Do you love her?"

Balthier sucked in a breath. Leave it to Fran to be frank and to the point. "Fran ..." he began, trying to dodge the inevitable bullet.

"We've been partners for nearly six years, Balthier," Fran said calmly. "I've watched you go through dozens of women, no second glances, no regrets. The bounty on your head is ridiculous, and it fazes you not a bit. But I ask you what you'll do when she becomes Queen, and you have no blase comment. No glib remark.

"I've been by your side when no one else would dare. You owe me the truth."

"Damn it, Fran," Balthier cursed, but smiled at her nonetheless. This viera was _maddening_ ... she could break even the most seemingly complex things into just a few sentences, and make him feel like a bleeding idiot.

"You love her," Fran said simply. "I knew it."

"How is it you knew it before I did?" he asked her after a few moments of silence.

"I didn't," she said simply. "You knew it all along. You just didn't want to admit it." Smiling fondly at him, she nodded in the direction of the stairs. "Are you going to sit with me all night, or are you going to go tell her?"

Balthier shook his head. "It's not the time, Fran," he said. "There's too much happening, and it _would_ be callous and cruel of me to drop this on her now."

Fran's eyes widened in realization. "You don't think she feels the same," she said. "You're afraid. Balthier, afraid. Amazing. Now I _have_ seen it all." She sighed. "Then don't tell her now. But you should be with her, regardless." She stood and took her leave of him.

The last thing she saw before going up the stairs was the sight of her best friend, brooding into his ale. Shaking her head, she grinned. She'd often wondered if she'd be around when he'd give up going through the girls, and find the girl who would go through _him._ Shocking, yet rather befitting, that it had taken a Princess.

It had truly been a day of amazing revelations.


	9. Tears and Rain

_**Part Nine  
**__**Tears and Rain**_

When Balthier finally decided to retire for the night, Ashe had already fallen asleep. She had spent a leisurely, almost _heavenly_ half-hour soaking in the bathtub, and then had changed into her pink cotton nightgown -- the one Balthier had been so fond of back in Rabanastre. Afterward, she had crawled between the sheets and hoped for a dreamless sleep. She didn't know if she could handle any more dreams at this point.

They all just seemed to shatter at her feet anyway. First her mother -- her beautiful, loving mother, Queen Yasminia, dying when Ashe was only four. Then losing not one, not two, but _all eight _of her brothers to war. Then Rasler and her father ... dreams of a happy, peaceful Dalmasca fallen at her feet, and she, powerless to pick up the shards and fix them.

And now Balthier -- the one thing in this whole ordeal that truly made sense to her -- well, he wasn't meant to be hers. It couldn't possibly work out that way. No, Ashe knew that nothing good would come to her, not any time soon. Maybe not ever at all. Perhaps this was a fool's errand. Maybe Dalmasca's crown was an unattainable goal. Even if it was, she couldn't let herself give up on it, not yet.

But if she got it -- if it all came down on her side, finally, what would she be losing in turn? When had her entire goal become so skewed, so blurry and unfocused? Of course, she knew the answer to that.

When she had met Balthier. Before, it had all made perfect sense. Revenge against the Empire, the restoration of her kingdom. It was all she wanted, all she thought she'd ever need. Enough to make her content, maybe even happy.

And now -- even if she got her crown back, she knew that without him, _happiness_ would be the unattainable goal.

She finally fell into a deep sleep, and that was when Balthier returned to the room.

He smiled to find her sleeping. She only ever looked _truly_ peaceful whilst she slept. In repose, she actually _looked_ like the young woman she was supposed to be. During her waking hours, the burden of her life took its toll on her, and it was impossible for her to keep it from showing on her lovely face.

Ashelia was easy to read, at least, Balthier thought she was. He felt certain that she shared his feelings. Yet he was terrified. Terrified to share them with her, terrified that he even _felt_ them in the first place. In his wonderfully _un_planned life plan, nowhere did he ever carve out a spot for love. He had Fran, whom he loved with his entire being (but in a completely _unromantic_ fashion -- they had tried that once and it had been horribly awkward), and he assumed she'd ever be the only woman (viera counted as women, he surmised) that he would need in his life.

There was no room for a Princess who had risen from the ashes like Phoenix. Ashe. The name now, made more sense than it ever had to him. A bit of destiny, that.

No one had said anything about painfully sad ice-crystal eyes framed by impossibly long lashes, skin that looked like gold dust had been sprinkled upon it, or silky flaxen hair. Had anyone said anything of the sort to him, he would have laughed heartily and continued on his way.

But it had only taken one sidelong glance in the Garamsythe Waterway so many weeks ago for him to realize that there was nothing ordinary about this girl, this situation. Not because she was a beauty, though she definitely was that, but because she just _was_. There was no other explanation needed for him.

Ashelia B'Nargin Dalmasca _just was_.

And soon, she would be Queen. He had no doubt of that in his mind. And no finer Queen could he imagine. But what was to become of them, then? Part of him wanted to believe that there would be nothing to worry about, that everything would remain the same as it was now. But the other part, the bigger part, the part he tried his damndest to ignore, knew that everything _would _change. That part of him knew that he would lose the only woman he had ever -- _would_ ever -- love. Fran, she didn't count. He loved her, but it was an entirely different situation. No, this was about Ashelia.

There was another part of him. A dark, selfish part that he loathed. That part of him wanted to ask her to give it all up -- for him. Oh, he'd never do it, to be sure, but the thought was in his mind more often than not. He wondered if -- in some hidden corner of her mind or heart -- if she ever had the same thought.

Probably not. Ashelia _was_ Dalmasca. Her whole goal was to see it restored, with _her_ on the throne.

_Queens do not consort with pirates. _She had said those very words to him, only that morning. Had she meant it? And if she had -- then maybe he'd been misreading her intentions all along ...

He readied himself for bed and crawled in beside the Princess. She instinctively curled up closer to him and sighed contentedly. He absently ran his fingers through her hair and exhaled heavily. None of it mattered, he knew. Tomorrow could go to hell, as far as he was concerned.

As long as he could still have moments like this ...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next morning, neither of them said anything of their thoughts the previous evening. Ashe smiled at him, greeted him with a kiss, acted as though she could see no end in sight for them. And he took her cues, acted the same.

Inside, they both ached.

They met the rest of the group and began the incredibly long trip to the Feywood. They took a shortcut through the Cerobi Steppe back to the Tchita Uplands, thus effectively avoiding Archades altogether, and continued onward toward the mystic Feywood. They decided to go via Mt. Bur-Omisace and arrived there late in the evening.

"We could rest here tonight, Highness, and continue on in the morning," Basch said when they reached the Mountain.

Ashe nodded her acquiescence, and began helping to set up tents. The day had been long, trying, and her bones felt like jelly. All she wanted to do was collapse onto her bedroll among piles and piles of blankets and sleep, and she knew that wouldn't happen if she shared a tent with Balthier. Turning to Penelo, she smiled slightly. "Penelo, would you mind very much sharing a tent with me tonight?"

Balthier's eyebrows quirked at the Princess' request. Avoiding him, was she?

Penelo, oblivious to what was going on, merely nodded. "Of course, Ashe," she said. She smiled apologetically at Balthier. "I guess _you_ get Vaan tonight."

"Oh, bloody hell," Balthier snapped. "Princess? A word?"

Ashe closed her eyes, put a hand to her forehead. "Not tonight, Balthier," she said softly. "I'm -- tired."

"We're all tired!" he exclaimed. "And you're_ not _sticking me with Vaan."

"So stick him with Basch, and share with Fran. Whatever you need to do, just do it," Ashe said quietly, not wanting this scene, not wanting it here or now.

"Um, I'm right here," Vaan said, obviously insulted.

Penelo shook her head at him covertly. "Not now, Vaan," she whispered.

Ashe turned, headed for a tent, but Balthier grabbed her roughly around the waist and lifted her off the ground. "Balthier! I'm not -- not _doing_ this now!" she shouted.

"Oh, yes, you are," he said crisply. "Come on." He carried her away from the group, out of eyesight or earshot, and finally put her down.

She folder her arms across her chest and looked at him stonily. "Feel better now?" she asked him coolly.

"No, I don't feel _better now_," he retorted. "What the hell is going on?"

She didn't look at him, couldn't look at him. "I'm just tired. I just want to sleep. And I know that if you're with me ..."

Balthier's eyes shone angrily. "Oh, I see. Because that's all I could possibly want, right? Because I'm just some randy sky pirate with naught else on my mind but a good shag."

Ashe's eyes sparked. "I didn't say that ..."

"You didn't have to," he hissed. "Did it ever occur to you, Princess, that if that's all I was in this for, I'd be gone by now?"

Ashe finally looked at him, and her gaze pierced his heart. "Well, then, what _are_ you in this for?" she said stonily. "Oh, wait, I remember. Treasure. That's the only reason you've stuck around so long. Me -- I was just a _bonus_."

"Damn it all to hell," Balthier cursed, feeling his blood boil. "Are we _really_ going back there again?"

Ashe shook her head, willed herself not to cry. She'd made it through worse things in her life with minimal tears, she wasn't about to start crying now. "No, Balthier, we're not. We're not going anywhere." She stopped, took a deep breath. "And that's just the point. There's nowhere for us to go, so why bother?"

"Why -- why bother?" Balthier shot back at her. "Ashelia, what exactly are you saying here?"

"I'm saying that this -- this is never going to work. We both know that. And there's no reason to prolong the inevitable." She bit her lip, took a step closer to him. Placed her hand on his cheek and looked at him longingly, wistfully. "I wish ..." She let her sentence drop off, unfinished.

"Ashelia, you don't have to do this," he told her, quiet now.

"I do. Someone has to. Before it's too late. It might as well be me. I'll be Queen someday, and the tough decisions will be mine and mine alone to make. So I'll start now," she said.

"I'm not going anywhere," he told her earnestly. "I'm in this for the long run."

"Something more valuable, right?" she said softly as she looked down at her own ring. "I hope you find it."

She turned and walked back to camp, left him alone with his thoughts.

"I already have." He sighed into the cool evening air, watched her walk away from him.

And for once, he didn't have all the answers. He didn't know how to repair what was broken here, didn't know if it was even something he _should_ fix.

But _should_ didn't matter. He _needed_ to fix this. Before he lost her for good, to a crown.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**A/N:** Eek! I know, angst, angst, angst! This is _not_ the end though, so no getting mad at me! XD We all knew this was coming ... but just hang in there with me, okay?

Sorry this chap is a little on the short side. The next ones will be longer, and I should get them up pretty quickly. Thanks again to everyone for reviewing. I really hope you'll tough this out with me, this is a tough story to tell! XD


	10. A Long Walk

**A/N: I know, I know, I've been an awful updater. Don't really have a good excuse, except I was lazy. But I'm back now. And I promise you, this story is going to get finished! XD **

This isn't a long chappie, and it's an angst-bucket. But I hope you'll like it. Oh, yeah, I've started planting the seeds of another possible love connection in this chapter, so I hope everyone is receptive to it. I'm not sure how far I'm gonna take it, I just want to see where it goes. Enjoy!

_Part Ten__  
A Long Walk_

The trek through the Feywood and into Giruvegan proved to be very grueling, not only physically, but emotionally and mentally as well. Mist swirled about the party, at times thick enough to obscure Ashe's vision. She feared she might truly become lost in the Feywood -- and then a tiny, dark voice in her head wondered if that would be so bad.

"You shouldn't dally," Fran's voice quietly coaxed Ashe back from her gloomy ruminations. "One could easily become lost forever here." The look in Fran's eyes when she said it made Ashe wonder if the viera was reading her thoughts.

Ashe regarded the viera solemnly. This was Balthier's partner, his best friend, his most trusted confidante. Could Ashe trust her, as well? "Does -- does the mist not bother you?" she asked Fran carefully, remembering the events aboard the Dreadnought _Leviathan_ not so very long ago.

Fran smiled wanly. The mist was not what was bothering the Lady Ashe, but she wouldn't press the subject. "This mist is cooled, natural. Not forced to the boiling point. I am fine."

Ashe nodded. "Fran --" she started, but then stopped herself.

_Ah_, Fran thought, _here it is._ She knew exactly what was troubling Ashe, for it was the same thing that was troubling Balthier. And neither of them were speaking of it. Fran thought that in this case, the Lady might be more willing to confide in her. Sighing, she touched Ashe's shoulder lightly. "You did what you had to do," she said simply. "He isn't angry. Deep down, he knows that you're only doing what you think is best."

Ashe stared straight ahead. "It's best," she said, mostly to herself. "It _is_." She said it more firmly now. "Princesses and pirates -- they just don't blend."

"Ah," Fran remarked thoughtfully. "But what of insurgents and ex-judges? You really aren't so very different."

Ashe sighed. "Yes, we are," she whispered after a long pause. "He's the sky and I am the desert. And there is a great amount of jagd between us."

"But with the proper stones, even airships may enter jagd," Fran pointed out. "I forsook my home and family to take to the skies, even though it broke every rule I had ever known. Rules don't have to be set in stone. Breaking them can lead to some wonderful things."

"I know," Ashe said. "But -- I can't."

Fran arched an eyebrow. "Can't? Or _won't_?"

"_Can't_," Ashe said vehemently. "Everyone I've ever let myself love has died. I won't let myself kill anyone else." As soon as she said it, she wanted to take it back. She'd never spoken aloud to anyone this fear -- the fear that she was cursed.

"Ashe, you've killed no one," Fran said gently.

"I'm the _only_ living soul in the Dalmasca family. My mother, all eight of my brothers -- _eight _-- my father. Rasler. I'm -- I'm cursed. And Balthier will _not _be next. I -- I couldn't bear it." Ashe blinked back the tears that she was unaccustomed to. Strangely, it felt good -- almost cathartic -- to finally admit it out loud.

Ashelia B'Nargin Dalmasca was cursed. Doomed to lose everyone she ever loved. Never meant to be happy.

"You're _not_ cursed," Fran said gently, but firmly. The evidence was damning, though, and she understood perfectly how Ashe might come to feel that way. "Unlucky, maybe, but not cursed."

Ashe only shook her head. "I'm sorry," she said, walking away.

Balthier joined Fran awhile later. "What did you find out?" he asked her.

"I'm not your spy," Fran told him. "What she told me was in confidence."

"Fran," Balthier said warningly.

She looked at him, saw the anguish on his face, and felt her own heart crumble. "It won't be so easy for you. She's afraid. I don't think that even you can fix this one." She touched his cheek when he looked away. "I didn't say to give up on her. _Don't_."

"Wasn't planning to," Balthier said glibly, a hint of his former self in his voice.

Fran merely nodded. Inside, though, she worried for him. And for Ashe. She wanted to believe in the good -- that love truly _would_ conquer all. But she had to prepare for the worst.

The worst being what she had always known -- that sometimes, love just _wasn't_ enough. There were some obstacles that nothing, just nothing, could overcome.

Ashe couldn't -- _wouldn't_ -- give up the throne. She'd worked too long, too hard, to get it back. To just walk away now would be unfathomable to her. And would Balthier give up the skies for her? Fran didn't know. He might -- but then he'd be a member of the royal court. The Queen's consort or some such thing. Could he be happy as such? Or would they both want more? Would Ashe choose to make him -- _King_?

Fran paused. The notion was absurd. Perhaps Ashe had been right. Maybe there was no way that this gap could be bridged.

She heard the heavy footsteps behind her, and slowed to allow the Captain to catch up to her. Over the course of this journey, she and Basch had oftentimes been the voices of maturity and reason, and had more often than not found themselves bunking together. They'd had several conversations about the state of the party -- more specifically, the state of Balthier and Ashe. She'd grown quite fond of the Captain, and felt he was someone she could trust nearly as fully as she trusted Balthier.

"You look troubled," Basch said as he fell into step with her. "You're worried for Balthier."

Fran nodded, looked at Basch out of the corner of her eye. "I am. He's more than just my partner. For a long time, I believed he was the only one who truly understood me. The only one who ever would." She shook her head, her long silver hair dancing around her shoulders. "I've seen him go through dozens of women, and I always hoped he'd find the one to go through him."

"And now you're afraid that he has," Basch finished for her.

Fran nodded. "You worry for Ashe, I know. But Balthier won't wrong her, I promise you." She smiled. "He might be quite the rake -- but he loves her. Only her."

Basch looked thoughtful for a moment, wondering how to put what he wanted to ask delicately. "Does he love her enough, though, to give up the skies? And -- you?"

"We're not _that_ kind of partners, Captain," Fran said lightly, slightly disconcerted at the intense look in Basch's eyes. "Never have been."

Now Basch was taken aback. "Forgive me. I presumed far too much," he apologized, his cheeks flushing ever-so-slightly.

"Most people presume as much," Fran said softly. She wondered how they had gone for so long without this topic coming up. It was obviously something Basch had wondered about before. She tilted her head to the side, studied the man beside her for a long moment before speaking again. "Not long after we met -- about six years ago -- well, we _almost_ ... He was handsome, and he knew all the things to say. But it wasn't meant to be, I suppose. There were -- difficulties." She laughed a little at the memory, and how horribly awkward the whole experience had been. "We laughed it off, swore never to attempt it again, and that was that."

"Your closeness to him would suggest otherwise," Basch remarked carefully.

"We _do_ live together," she said with good humor. "I know things about him that I'd rather not. And we love each other, very much. I could love no one more. Though the relationship does lack a certain -- romance." Her reddish-brown eyes twinkled merrily.

"Forgive me, but I didn't realize that viera appreciated the traditional romantic gestures," Basch said after a pause.

Fran laughed at that. "We are still _women_, after all!" she exclaimed.

Ashe turned at the sound of Fran's laughter -- a sound not often heard. When she saw Basch and Fran walking together, smiling about something, deep in conversation, she felt a tiny flutter in her heart. Jealousy? Not because she had designs on Basch -- gods, no! No, just because she wished desperately to be walking and talking with Balthier, laughing at some nonsense that he was spewing.

But she couldn't do that any more. Would never be able to do that again. She had made her decision, and she would stand by it. There could be no other choice for her ... could there?

_Queens do not consort with sky pirates ..._

Her own words came rushing back to her, and for the first time in her entire life, she didn't want to _be_ Queen.

She only wanted to be _his._


	11. A Confessional Transgression

_Part Eleven  
A Confessional Transgression_

"I - I - I ..." Ashe stammered, unable to make her mouth form words. The trunk of one of the Feywood's enormous trees was scraping against the skin of her back, and Balthier's hands were roaming to places they had no business in anymore. His mouth was ravishing hers as if she was oxygen, and he couldn't breathe.

Ashe pushed him back with all the force she had in her tiny frame, desperate to clear her mind, her heart. How had this happened? Only a few short minutes ago, she'd been trudging through the seemingly never-ending Feywood towards Giruvegan. Her thoughts had been leaning toward the dark, the unfathomable -- Give up the crown? Give up the crown for a _pirate_? -- and that's when she had been accosted. She'd been pulled into a secluded trove of trees, out of sight from the rest of the party, the rest of the world.

She'd had no time to protest, not time to cry out, for Balthier's mouth had crushed hers immediately, in such a way that it seemed as though his life depended on it. And for just a moment, Ashe had been able to forget about everything and everyone else. For just a moment, the world had been right once again.

But now her senses were returning to her, and all she felt was fury. "Balthier!" she hissed, trying like mad to straighten her disheveled appearance. "_What_ is the meaning of this?"

Balthier leaned nonchalantly against a tree, an almost bored expression on his face. "Well, Princess," he began, "as I see it, it was_ you_ who chose to walk away from this." He held up his hand when she started to protest. "Ah, ah, ah. I'm not finished, and by _gods_ you're going to let me have _my _say this time." Ashe clamped her mouth shut at the angry tone in his voice -- a tone she'd not heard from him before.

"I should have left you alone," he continued. "I admit it. But breaking the rules, it's what I do." He shrugged. "And at first, that's what this was about. Doing something -- in this case, _you_ -- just to prove that I could."

Ashe nodded ever-so-slightly. She couldn't be angry, not when her first thoughts about him had been much the same, though it shamed her to admit it now. She'd just wanted to do something selfish, something that was just for her, and not for Dalmasca or the "greater good". She'd had no idea it would ever go so far ... She looked back at her companion. "And now?" she asked him, wanting to hold her breath, not wanting to hear the answer.

"Now?" Balthier laughed sardonically. "Now you're all I bloody think about. And if you choose to walk away, that's your decision. But I'm not giving you up without a fight." He put his hand on her shoulder, leaned over so that his lips brushed her ear as he whispered, "and I fight dirty."

Ashe shivered, almost imperceptibly. "As evidenced by your present behavior," she said coolly, struggling to hold on to what little dignity she had left around him. "Nothing you do is going to change my mind, Balthier. It's over."

He grabbed her arm before she could walk away. "You're wrong, Princess, and you know it. This won't be over until we're _both_ dead and buried. Keep that in mind."

She glared at him. "You presume far too much about my feelings." She said it icily, praying he wouldn't push her, wouldn't force her to admit it aloud. Her will to say no to him all hinged on one phrase ... if he said it, or made her say it ... she feared there would be no walking away.

His hazel eyes flashed. She recognized the look. She had inadvertedly challenged him, and he _never_ backed down from a challenge. "Presume too much, do I?" he retorted. "How can you possibly expect me to believe that? I've been with you." He lowered his voice now, his eyes glowing darkly. "I've been _in_ you. I've heard ever whisper, every moan, every sound you've made, even the ones you didn't _know _you were making. Especially those. I know your feelings, Ashelia, because they are _mine_, too."

Ashe's breath had hitched in her throat and she closed her eyes, too tired to fight. "Do you love me?" she said quietly.

"What?" Balthier said, not quite sure that he had heard her correctly.

"You say our feelings are the same. Well, if they are, then you would ... you would know. You would _have_ to know that I ..." she trailed off. She opened her eyes, saw the bewilderment on his face.

"Ashe ..." he said softly. He made no move to touch her, afraid that she would run away if he did.

She met his eyes squarely. "I didn't want to. I thought that my chance for that ended when Rasler died. But then -- you, and ... I have to think that there's a reason for all of this, but I haven't figured it out yet. I just know that, if it were up to me ..." She paused, looked away, willing herself not to let the tears fall now. "If tomorrow I woke up, and I could have whatever I wanted most in the whole world, with no regrets, no worries ... If I _could_, then by the gods, Balthier, I would choose _you_." She blinked and the tears fell soundlessly down her cheeks. She didn't even bother to wipe them away. "Can you let that be enough?" she asked in a voice that was barely audible. "Please, don't make this any harder." She touched his cheek softly, and then turned and left him alone.

He stood there, reliving the past few moments in his mind. She loved him, but she wanted him to walk away, leave her alone. The girl must be crazy if she thought that was in any way possible for him.

She'd seen the best of him -- she _knew _the worst. And yet, she still _chose _him. That alone was worth more to him than all the treasures he'd ever acquired.

Walk away now? Not bloody likely.

**A/N:**** OMG what are the odds of me updating twice in two days? I know, crazy! But anyway, here's the next chap. No plot movement here, as you can see. Just more angst-ing. Which is always fun, right? **

**Actually, this chap has a line in it that I've had in my head since I started this story. This chapter broke my heart to write, really. I hope you guys enjoy this. I promise to take this to a sunnier place in the future ... but I haven't quite decided how we're going to end this yet. Guess you'll have to stick with me to find out!**


End file.
